|
Fictional Hogan/Angle Conversation
|
|
Topic Started: Mar 19 2008, 10:39 AM (283 Views)
|
|
Cybrus
|
Mar 19 2008, 10:39 AM
Post #1
|
|
STAY HYPED!!!
- Posts:
- 55,819
- Group:
- Members
- Member
- #1
- Joined:
- August 24, 2005
- All Time Favorite Wrestler(s):
- Stone Cold Steve Austin
- Favorite Active Wrestler(s):
- Seth Rollins, Bray Wyatt
- STATUS:
- WWE Universal Champion!
|
I saw this over at the Torch. It's funny, mostly for the fact that a lot of their interviews sound almost exactly like this conversation. Enjoy.
- Quote:
-
Professional Wrestling Superstars Hulk Hogan and Kurt Angle engaged in a lengthy phone conversation recently, the transcript of which has been leaked to WWS courtesy of the NSA. (Thanks Patriot Act!)
Amazingly, the entire conversation between the two men takes place without either one of them telling the truth, ever. While "working" others in such a way has become so engrained in the two men it most likely seemed like a typical conversation for both, an honest reader will find it a remarkable example of two people totally lost in their own bulls**t.
HOGAN
Hello? Who's this?
ANGLE
Hey brotha, it's Kurt. Didn't I come up on your caller ID?
HOGAN
Nah, I don't have caller ID.
ANGLE
Me neither. How you feeling, brother?
HOGAN
Healthy.
ANGLE
Oh, me too. Healthy.
HOGAN
Never felt better.
ANGLE
I feel young, you know?
HOGAN
Young, flexible and mobile.
ANGLE
Young, flexible, mobile, and sober.
HOGAN
Young, flexible, mobile, sober, and not the least bit insecure.
ANGLE
How's Linda?
HOGAN
Begging for me to come back. I was just sitting here by the pool thinking about how faithful I've been to her these past thirty years. How's Karen?
ANGLE
As sweet and gentle as ever. Nick and Brooke?
HOGAN
Well adjusted. Great heads on their shoulders.
ANGLE
Hey brother, I heard you and Eric are starting a new International Wrestling Promotion.
HOGAN
Already running house shows.
ANGLE
You know my contract with TNA goes until 2097, but they do let me work anywhere else I want, whenever I want. I love to work with you, and Eric's a great guy.
HOGAN
Great guy.
ANGLE
Hell of a great guy.
HOGAN
Normal guy. Not weird at all.
ANGLE
No. And generous. I read his book twice.
HOGAN
I read it three times, brotha.
ANGLE
I loved it so much I cut it into small pieces, boiled it, and ate it while I prayed that his words would digest into my body and I could remember them eternally.
HOGAN
The new promotion is gonna be global, brotha. Huge. You want in, we'll give you a sweet deal. Couple of TV tapings a year and a couple of PPV's.
ANGLE
You've got TV?
HOGAN
All three networks in prime time. Plus youtube and google.
ANGLE
You'll be on those?
HOGAN
We bought em. And PPV's live every night. I can’t talk long about it right now, brotha, cause I'm training for Wrestlemania.
ANGLE
Yeah, I knew you'd do a surprise run in at Wrestlemaina.
HOGAN
You can’t have a Wrestlemania with out the Hulkster, brotha. I'm gonna to a run in, punk out Mayweather and slam the Big Show. It's gonna be bigger than Wrestlemaina 3.
ANGLE
Watching you slam Andre was the greatest moment of my life.
HOGAN
Andre's too.
ANGLE
I know, he told me last night in a dream.
HOGAN
I'll never forget the roar of the crowd. 190,000 people in the Sliverdome.
ANGLE
How could I forget, I was in the front row.
HOGAN
I remember, I saw you. I didn't know who you were but I glanced out in the front row and caught a glimpse of you just as I had all 900 pounds of the Giant up the air. I said to my self "that kid's gonna be an Olympic Gold Medallist in 1996 in Atlanta."
ANGLE
I watched that entire Wrestlemaina with a broken friggen neck.
HOGAN
I know.
ANGLE
It's true. It's damn true.
HOGAN
I never forget when I slammed Andre down and the whole ring collapsed around us. He was laying there dying, you know. And as he breathed his last breath he looked up at me and said, "Hulkster, the torch is passed."
ANGLE
I heard him.
HOGAN
The giant passed the torch to me. And if you wanna come in for us, I want to do the same for you. Lay down and finally pass the torch to the greatest wrestler in this business, Kurt Angle.
ANGLE
I know you'd do that for me, brother. I can start tonight.
HOGAN
I'll fax you the contract from my MacAir. Oh – gonna go Vince is on the other line.
ANGLE
Funny, Vince is on my other line too.
HOGAN
Great talking to you.
ANGLE
Always.
There were several funny parts to this, but the funniest part to me was:
Angle: Watching you slam Andre was the greatest moment of my life. Hogan: Andre's too.
|
|
|
| |
|
_DL_
|
Mar 19 2008, 03:28 PM
Post #2
|
|
BURN IT DOOOWWNNNNNNNN!
- Posts:
- 43,526
- Group:
- Administrator
- Member
- #31
- Joined:
- January 20, 2006
- Current Theme:
- Vox
- All Time Favorite Wrestler(s):
- Stone Cold Steve Austin
- STATUS:
- Wasting Life
- Favorite Brand:
- Lucha Underground
|
- Quote:
-
HOGAN
I remember, I saw you. I didn't know who you were but I glanced out in the front row and caught a glimpse of you just as I had all 900 pounds of the Giant up the air. I said to my self "that kid's gonna be an Olympic Gold Medallist in 1996 in Atlanta."
LOL!
|
|
|
| |
|
Jknight253
|
Mar 19 2008, 06:23 PM
Post #3
|
|
- Posts:
- 2,289
- Group:
- Members
- Member
- #450
- Joined:
- July 12, 2007
- All Time Favorite Wrestler(s):
- The Rock
- Favorite Active Wrestler(s):
- Shawn Michaels.
|
ANGLE
I watched that entire Wrestlemaina with a broken friggen neck.
|
|
|
| |
|
Kame
|
Mar 19 2008, 08:44 PM
Post #4
|
|
- Posts:
- 18,515
- Group:
- Members
- Member
- #17
- Joined:
- January 8, 2006
- Current Theme:
- Classic Teal
- All Time Favorite Wrestler(s):
- Eddie Guerrero
|
Kind of funny, I guess. I didn't laugh out loud at anything, but the poking fun at Bischoff made me grin a little. Good find, Cy.
|
|
|
| |
|
MY85
|
Mar 20 2008, 06:05 AM
Post #5
|
|
It's a fabulous new day, yes it is!
- Posts:
- 23,115
- Group:
- Members
- Member
- #227
- Joined:
- July 15, 2006
- All Time Favorite Wrestler(s):
- Shawn Michaels
- Favorite Active Wrestler(s):
- Seth Rollins, AJ Styles, Finn Balor, The New Day, Sasha Banks
- STATUS:
- Just another day in life.
|
That's fucking hilarious.
|
|
|
| |
|
whatwhat
|
Apr 9 2008, 10:27 AM
Post #6
|
|
- Posts:
- 12
- Group:
- Members
- Member
- #33
- Joined:
- January 21, 2006
|
That was fucking Gold.
|
|
|
| |
| 1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
|