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The All Purpose Negima Fanfiction Thread Backup Redux; In case TvTropes shuts down forums. may we never have to use this.
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Topic Started: Apr 6 2012, 07:22 PM (12,405 Views)
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IAmNotCreativeEnough
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May 15 2012, 09:53 AM
Post #136
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Has Problems Giving A Shit
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... *Can Actually Read Spanish*
Hah. Chamo nosebleed with Rakan's nipple.
It seems Volume 0 is absolutely inconsequential and doesn't answer any of the questions that just bug me.
Konoka's last line says: "It seems nobody will end up content with this."
... She has no idea how right she is. NOBODY was satisfied with that.
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- rikalous wrote
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Yes I am. I said I would, and I hate going back on my word. IANCE, you pustulating whoreson, I am going to find you when this is over. They will make a torture porn movie about your death, and they will have to tone it down to maintain suspension of disbelief.
- Shadow Crystal Mage wrote
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There there. Go do evil things in the name of the government to feel better.
There Be Whales Here
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OverMaster
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May 15 2012, 05:35 PM
Post #137
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Oboy. Whee.
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Cocone's segment was particularly disappointing, since it seemed it was actually going to answer at least a minor enigma straight, but it became a page of nothing we didn't already know.
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What is the point anymore?
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IAmNotCreativeEnough
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May 16 2012, 10:00 AM
Post #138
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Has Problems Giving A Shit
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Exactly. Volume Zero was much less disappointing when there was still hope that those questions could be answered. We didn't even get Chisame's nipples, ¬¬
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- rikalous wrote
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Yes I am. I said I would, and I hate going back on my word. IANCE, you pustulating whoreson, I am going to find you when this is over. They will make a torture porn movie about your death, and they will have to tone it down to maintain suspension of disbelief.
- Shadow Crystal Mage wrote
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There there. Go do evil things in the name of the government to feel better.
There Be Whales Here
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rikalous
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May 16 2012, 02:16 PM
Post #139
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Creature of the Deep
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Akamatsu's got a phobia of nipples due to a traumatic event earlier in his life. I'm just impressed he had the nerve to draw them on Rakan.
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Let's Watch Nanoha Wits, magic, and hardboiled monologues. My other claims to fame.
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OverMaster
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May 16 2012, 02:24 PM
Post #140
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Oboy. Whee.
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Drawing them left Akamatsu so wrecked he swore off on Negima.
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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May 23 2012, 09:55 AM
Post #141
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Oboy. Whee.
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Thirty One Clown Princesses in Amber
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Joker's Big Break
The wall crumbled down and Chachamaru, holding a jackhammer bigger than herself, walked into the cell, followed by Evangeline, Ako, and a Yuuna with two still smoking guns.
"Dad!" Yuuna called out. "Let's go! The coppers will be here in no time like white on rice!"
"Let them come!" Eva huffed. "I fear no one! I will destroy all of them, plus the Batman, too...!"
"You'll miss the soap opera if we stay here too long..." Ako warned.
"I don't care! Chachamaru left the recorder on!"
Chachamaru blinked. "Actually..."
Eva's eyes bulged out. "YOU FORGOT?-!"
"My apologies. I was extremely busy with the details of this escape plan, so it seems I failed to properly assimilate your request..."
Eva suplexed her against the floor. All of Arkham quaked. "STUPID DOLL!"
Joker didn't lift his eyes from the book he was reading. "Come back next week."
"WHAT?-!" Yuuna cried. "DAD!"
"We'll have a softball game this weekend, I bet thirteen thousand on Dent's team, and I won't miss any chance to see Croc making an ass of himself in a game. Next week."
"But—! But—!" Ako stammered. "We can't do this again next week!"
"Of course you can. You heard me."
"Now, you're being unreasonable..." Yuuna muttered.
Joker gave her a look.
"... I mean, even for you!" her decadently inclined Jokerette said.
"We could try breaking everyone out and having the game somehwere outside..." Chachamaru proposed.
Everyone gave her a look.
"... My apologies."
Joker sighed and returned to his reading. "Next week!" he said, taking the issue for settled.
Evangeline walked to him, whacked him down across the head, and flung the knocked out body over her shoulder. "On our way out, now, " she commanded.
"But... But he said 'Next week...'" and Ako shuddered.
Eva rolled her eyes. "Of course I'm going with 'Next week'. That's right when he'll wake up."
Yuuna scratched her head. "Not sure that's gonna fly, but eeeehhhhh..."
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As the Old Saying Goes...
Robin crouched down to analyze the piece of evidence left in the cage as he mused, "I don't get it. What could the Joker Gang need with all the monkeys in the zoo?"
"Hnh, " Batman grunted. "It ties with the rumors of an illegal shipment of Brazilian howling monkeys being smuggled into Gotham last week. Maybe they want to use them to spread some disease..."
Deep under the funhouse:
Yue looked blandly at the giggling Haruna and Hakase, as the latter finishing putting the screws on the headpiece of yet another monkey. "I'm pretty sure we won't duplicate the works of Shakespeare this way..."
Hakase hushed her. "Quiet, quiet and bring us another typewriter. We have another one ready for the big test...!"
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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May 24 2012, 05:56 PM
Post #142
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Oboy. Whee.
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Repeated Card
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Zazie appeared behind her then. "Sister."
She didn't turn around. "So? Are you satisfied now-poyo?"
"Satisfied? No. You posed as me, to take place in an event I didn't approve of, making look like my stance on the subject was the complete opposite of my real opinion. All for what? Are you still frustrated over Negi-sensei foiling your plans for the world of magic?"
Now Poyo looked back at her, over a shoulder. "In all honesty, no. I only did it for fun-poyo. You should try to have fun with your classmates more often. Today, you bonded with them more than ever before..."
"You never were one to search for fun, Sister."
There was a faint smile. "Maybe I just found amusing to toy with this particular human-poyo. What's the matter? Didn't it end well? Didn't you help him in the end? You know he won't hold my actions against you, even if he never learns the truth. So, why to feel worried about that-poyo?"
"I'll only say this: I won't reveal your involvement this time, but I don't want you to supplant my identity ever again."
Poyo turned fully around now. Strange eyes met stranger ones. "I don't understand you. You always will stand apart from them, yet you claim to worry about them-poyo."
"Just like you."
"I only intervened when a whole world's survival was at stake-poyo."
Zazie's head came a bit lower. "I can't explain it. I just want to be with them while I can. But in my own way."
Her sister's hand came to rest on her head. "You've never been good at talking with strangers-poyo."
"No."
"So you consider them strangers, even now? Despite how close you claim feeling to them-poyo?"
"I'm working on it. And I don't need your kind of help."
The hand was pulled back slowly, and Zazie almost heard a sigh of disapproval as Poyo turned around, beginning to walk away.
"You have until your high school graduation."
Zazie nodded, but she didn't say anything.
Perhaps, from now on, she'd do it the other way around. Talk to her friends, remain mum around family...
So yeah. That's why Zazie went fully opposite ways in 348 and then 349 with no explanation...?
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What is the point anymore?
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shanejayell
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Jun 8 2012, 06:10 AM
Post #143
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Yuri Fan
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Nice.
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http://www.fanfiction.net/~shanejayell http://groups.yahoo.com/group/shanejayell_fanfiction
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OverMaster
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Jul 9 2012, 08:02 PM
Post #144
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Oboy. Whee.
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The Empress' New Clothes
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Once upon a time, there lived a young empress who was obsessed with her appearance. She lived for her subjects' admiration, and loved to wear the most expensive and elaborate clothes to attract their attention.
However, rather early in her life, after trying all sorts of outlandish and elegant clothes alike, there was nothing left that Empress Chiu hadn't already worn before. She became desperate in her search for new clothes worthy of her, so she issued an edict offering untold riches to whoever could make the most wonderful, most unforgettable dress of them all for her.
Many tailors and dressmakers tried, but they all failed to offer anything Empress Chiu hadn't worn before. Until two pint sized twin tailors strode into palace grinning impishly and offered Empress Chiu the most special of all dresses.
"It's made from the most miraclous of all fabrics!" the sisters boasted. "Only those who are intelligent, refinated and honest can see it! The fools, the incompetent and the useless can see nothing but air instead!"
That terrified Empress Chiu since she couldn't see anything, but to be sure, she called on the smartest woman she knew, the Royal Chief of Librarians, and asked for her opinion on the subject. Before the shy Chief Librarian could say anything, the twin tailors quickly expanded again on the wonders and marvels of the fabric. At that, the Chief Librarian choked, blushed, took the bangs of hair obscuring her face away, and issued a stammering but praising review of the legendary fabric.
So did Countess Yukihiro when asked on the subject.
As well as the freckled Director of the Royal Theater.
And the bespectacled Chief of Royal Artists.
And the Royal Ermine.
Captain Asuna of the Royal Guard bluntly said "I can't see a fuck there!", but everyone knew she was an idiot, so that was only confirmation.
Amongst the cheers of the whole court but the mumbling Captain Asuna, the Empress announced she would wear the miracle dress during the next week's royal parade.
The great day arrived quickly, and the Empress marched proudly at the lead of the parade, smiling widely under the warm sun, under the acclamations and hurrahs of her people. By now, the stories about the dress' properties had spreaded everywhere, and everyone in attendance agreed on how gorgeous and radiant Empress Chiu looked in the most fascinating dress ever made. Even the foreign rulers brought for the ceremonies had joined the praise.
"It's incredible!" Princess Theodora gushed.
"It's astonishing!" Count Herrmann clapped.
"It isn't that bad, " Queen of the Night Evangeline snorted, and everyone was floored, because she had never given such high praise to anything or anyone.
But young Prince Negi of Ostia blushed and averted his gaze. "She-She isn't wearing anything!"
A complete, shocked silence fell all over the crowd.
"Excuse... me...?" Empress Chiu's right eyebrow twitched.
Prince Negi dared to show an eye from between the fingers intertwined on his face. "Y-Y-You... You aren't wearing anything!"
A great gasp ran through the masses.
"You know, if the wise young Prince is saying it..." Royal Instructor Takahata whispered to his colleague Shizuna, who nodded.
"There is no way Prince Negi can be wrong!" Royal Physician Ako declared with all the passion of a woman in love.
Countess Yukihiro choked on her saliva. "That... That is true! But... But then...!"
"I knew it all the fucking time!" Captain Asuna slammed a foot down.
"She isn't wearing anything!" the crowd began to chant.
"The Empress is naked!" the chants began to become a taunting choir.
Seething red, mad with anger, powerless and humbled, Empress Chiu loomed over the only cause of her humiliation at hand now the tailor twins had most likely fled the country. "BRRRRRRAAAAAAATTTTT!"
As she went for his throat, however, her long hair tickled the Prince's nose, and then he sneezed, and an expanding boom filled the whole city.
That day, everyone could say they dressed just like an empress.
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Aug 5 2012, 06:37 PM
Post #145
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Oboy. Whee.
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Code Negima
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"I can't believe it!" Prince Negi said, proving he was no Naruto. "Mother, you can't just allow this! My father must be found, and the culprits of his disappearance and Nekane's blindness must be punished!"
Queen Arika, with her back turned to him, spoke regally, in an oddly Norio Wakamoto-esque tone. "I have taken my decision, boy! If you insist on disobeying me, there is no place for you at this palace!"
"Then so be it!" Negi said. "I'll take Nekane with me to Area 11 and find Father myself!"
He grabbed Nekane's wheelchair and began pushing it for the door.
"You know, " Nekane mused, "For a time I get a regular role in a series..."
—-
"Oh, that's Asuna-san, " Ayaka said, puffing her chest up to better fit into the Milly role. "She's rarely around, since she is sickly all the time. Or so she claims, because I'm sure she only uses that as an excuse to skip classes. Probably acting as a hooligan piloting giant mecha and rebeling against the authorities like the ape she is."
Negi sweatdropped. "Isn't that a very big and serious assumption, Yukihiro-san?"
"A Class Re— Sorry, President of the Student Council knows when such things are happening, Sensei!"
From the other end of the hall, Asuna hid behind a pillar and tossed a shoe on Ayaka's head.
Ayaka roared, rubbing her head. "That's the worst polite and shy girl act I've ever seen!"
—-
"I am Evangeline, the Immortal Witch, " the straightjacketed girl said while she stood up from the container. "I'll grant you a great gift, Boya..."
"Oh, you mean a Geass, the evil eye that will allow me to submit all enemies to my will and force anyone to follow my orders?" Negi asked. "Well, that's sort of morally questionable, but since I am playing the role of a—"
"Actually, " Evangeline interrupted him, "I was thinking of making you a vampire, but sure, if it's a Geass what you want, I can give you that. Negi as a vampire fics have been overdone already anyway..."
—-
"Ah!" Hakase sighed, grabbing the edges of the table and staring, with stars in her eyes, at the picture of Chao on top of it. "Princess Chao of Britannia...! The most beautiful...ly smart and ingenious of all Britanic Chinese! Just wait! One of these days you'll notice me, and we'll embark together in a passionate mission to revolutionize the world forever! In the meanwhile, I shall have to satisfy my basest appetites with this primitive implement of furniture and your photographic image! You know, one of these days I'll just have to make myself a consolator. I mean, I'm a super genius, for Einstein's sake..."
"Excuse me, but I believe that's my half sister you're talking about there, " Nekane politely said from behind her, wheeling herself closer.
"Ha ha!" Hakase laughed. "It doesn't matter! Your visual disability means I can procceed freely with what I was about to do!"
"Actually, I can hear you rather well..." Nekane pinched her nose. "And smell you as well. Good God, woman...!"
"You're just jealous you can't stand up to lean on a comforting and understanding table!"
—-
"This, " Shizuna-sensei smiled at Kotaro, very glad her Kikuko Inoue voice allowed her to play Cecile. It had been so long since her last paid gig, and she couldn't stomach cat food anymore, "is the Lancelot, Kotaro-kun, the greatest and deadliest massive machine of warfare of the Empire. We must make sure that, under no circumstances, it is taken and piloted by any unprepared, dense, stubborn, shortsighted, brainless young hero that happens to pass by."
Kotaro looked up at her. "Not even if they can do really good spin kicks?"
"Well, physical dexterity is a desirable trait in a pilot, yes, but..."
"Dibs!" the boy said, jumping into the cockpit.
—-
"Good morning, Negi-sensei, " Chachamaru quietly said, walking into the room wearing her maid outfit. "The breakfast is ready, and..."
Negi woke up with the sound of her voice, then made a strident yell as he noticed the straightjacketed girl sleeping on top of him. "GYAH! IT'S YOU!"
Evangeline groaned and slammed a pillow down on his head. "Of course it's me, imbecile! I was a prisoner of a fucking government facility, do you think I had a wide variety of places where to go? Now let me sleep and bring me brunch in four hours or so!"
Nekane wheeled in after Chachamaru. "Negi, there are a few things we need to discuss about your students. For starters, I can't approach a table anymore with a clean... Is that the smell of a woman in an old unwashed straightjacket?"
Negi moaned and bashed his head against a wall. "Bring me the Zero costume, Chachamaru. I need to go, I don't know, scheme something somewhere far out of here..."
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Sep 19 2012, 06:48 PM
Post #146
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Oboy. Whee.
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Random snippet.
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Elseworld.
In the Autumn of 2003, I was contacted by Kakizaki Genjuro. I knew of the mass disappearance case, of course, since I hadn't been living under a rock. It was in everyone's mouths for months, because it had all the markings of a scandalous mystery, the kind we hadn't had for decades. In this age where everything can be explained, the vanishing of almost everyone in a classroom of an elite feminine academy, plus their cute and sympathetic child prodigy teacher, had all the ingredients for the shock news of the decade. Asakura Kazumi's book on the subject is the best proof of the sensational coverage that event had on Japanese society, of course, from the implied elements of xenophobia to the deep and yet all too quickly passing ruminations on the state of our then-current youth.
Kakizaki Genjuro wasn't satisfied with the work the Japanese police and even Scotland Yard were doing on the subject. He had the impression they were hiding something, and I was hired to cover that angle, being one of Japan's most effective private detectives. I knew of the possible risks involved in every high profile case, naturally, but it all was part of my job. So I took the offer, and then the next plane to Wales.
I talked with the older sister of young Mr. Springfield, one of the last, if not the absolute last, to see the class. Many suspected of her, but I don't think she had anything to do with it. It was obvious her brother's loss had devastated her, since she spoke nothing but vaguely implied nonsense. She sobbed at random points of our interview, then continued talking as if nothing had happened. Right before I departed, she took me aside, showed me some recent pictures of the latest unexplained sightings of natural phenomena on the surface of planet Mars, and went on a long and babbling rant on how that had been the tomb of her brother and millions more. Poor woman.
I must say, however, she made the best tea I have ever tasted.
Every path I investigated was a dead end. All clues ultimately led to nothing. After two weeks, I had nothing to show Kakizaki-sama. Then one night at a pub, drowning my sorrows, I ran once again into Inugami 'Lone Wolf' Kotaro, my self professed rival. We hadn't met for months, so he was all too happy to boast of how he had been hired by Senator Yukihiro to look on the old man's niece and her whereabouts. Typical. Even at this, he outdid me, landing himself a richer sponsor. However, I found some comfort on knowing he hadn't gone any further than me. So much for his fabled nose.
Two days after, the strange men rang at my hotel room's door and warned me in a thinly veiled way about continuing my investigations. They hinted at things man wasn't supposed to know. When I asked them, with my best snarking tone, why they weren't suited in black with dark glasses, they made very clear they weren't joking.
The day after, Kakizaki-sama called me. He thanked my efforts but said he had to recall my services. Noticing the added strain in his voice, I bluntly asked him if he had been visited. He said nothing but warning me he'd pay for my ticket back and add a generous bonus for my wasted time, but beyond that, he wouldn't make himself responsible for me.
I pride myself on being pragmatic, so I returned to Japan in the next flight. Inugami was on the seat next mine. But he didn't want to talk on anything for the whole trip. A first for him.
Months ago, we met again in a cafe, and he only told me he had seen things he just wanted to forget forever. We haven't touched the subject ever since.
One night, I was visited by a young woman in a concealing trenchcoat, hat and glasses. She was very pretty, but despite her smile, I could feel something oddly cracked within her.
I managed to recognize her from those class rosters I had to study carefully years ago. "Number Seventeen, right?"
She nodded. "I was the lucky one. Please tell Misa-chan's father I'm sorry."
I called him to tell him that. He only said he understood.
I'll take the rest of what Shiina-san told me to my grave.
I think she only was saying nonsense, anyway. Much like Springfield-san.
Last night, I had the oddest dream about two other girls in that class roster. One with glasses, and one with dark bangs all over her cute face. We were friends.
But dreams are only dreams.
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What is the point anymore?
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Shadow Crystal Mage
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Sep 21 2012, 02:31 PM
Post #147
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OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!
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LIMIT, WHAT DID YOU DO!!!!! The other thread's been closed!
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I AM THE OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!!!!!!
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Darkenning
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Sep 21 2012, 02:34 PM
Post #148
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Pervert. Also, Witch.
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It's just temporary, Mage. CALM DOWN and stop yelling at Limit when he can't even hear you.
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"Hello! I'm Rurin, the Magical Mouse! My favorite food is cheese! My favorite pastimes are tormenting cats and facilitating romance! I have the power to bind the souls of guys who mistreat women to the depths of hell and subject them to everlasting karmic suffering! Isn't that cute? Pleased to meet you!" -- Rurin, the Magical Mouse, Magical Patissiere Kosaki-chan.
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Shadow Crystal Mage
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Sep 21 2012, 02:40 PM
Post #149
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OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!
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I really hope so. Things like lockdowns get me twitchy after what happened to me in space battles.
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I AM THE OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!!!!!!
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No Limit
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Sep 21 2012, 02:40 PM
Post #150
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Knight Of Randomness
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I did what I had to do. To protect what I valued and loved.
And it'll open back up soon enough.
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Check out my dA.
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