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The All Purpose Negima Fanfiction Thread Backup Redux; In case TvTropes shuts down forums. may we never have to use this.
Topic Started: Apr 6 2012, 07:22 PM (12,387 Views)
shanejayell
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Yuri Fan
What the....
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http://www.fanfiction.net/~shanejayell
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/shanejayell_fanfiction
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OverMaster
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Oboy. Whee.

There Must Be Something Horribly Bad With My Blood.

Quote:
 
"Oh, so I'll have a grandson!" Konoka smiled widely as she read through the small tankoubon with UQ Holder written on the cover. "And he's so handsome, too! I wonder what kind of boy he is..."

As she read on, her smile faltered slowly.

—-

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE HUNG HERSELF?-!" Asuna screamed, hysterical. "HOW WILL WE TELL SETSUNA-SAN!"

Chisame read from the note she had left behind. "Here it says she had to do it before she had any children. I wonder why..."

Evangeline was reading the small tankoubon. "Meh. As if I ever could fall as low as this..."
What is the point anymore?
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Shadow Crystal Mage
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OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!

Relevant to Negima: http://www.buzzfeed.com/jessicamisener/9-shockingly-filthy-lines-from-latin-poetry

I especially like number 5. Paraphrased:

“Os et labra tibi lingit, Meyer, catellus: non miror, merdas si libet esse cani.”

Spoiler: click to toggle


I AM THE OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!!!!!!
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rikalous
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Creature of the Deep

I think I've heard of that last one. The translation was (spoilered for decency)
Spoiler: click to toggle
Let's Watch Nanoha
Wits, magic, and hardboiled monologues.
My other claims to fame.
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OverMaster
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Oboy. Whee.

Why, Japan, Why?

Quote:
 
With a grimly serious face, Negi faced the class, stared at them with icy dead eyes, and finally exploded in a scream.

"WHY, YOU, EVIL, FIENDISH WHALE MURDERERS!" Lowering his voice, he added politely, "Except you, Evangeline-san, Zazie-san."

Eva nodded. "Good."

Negi then ran out of the classroom, bawling his eyes out.

The whole class turned to look at Asuna.

She tossed her hands up. "I swear I only left him to watch some Animal Planet unchecked!"
What is the point anymore?
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shanejayell
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Yuri Fan
*lol*
Posted Image

http://www.fanfiction.net/~shanejayell
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/shanejayell_fanfiction
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OverMaster
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Oboy. Whee.

Travel Trouble.

Quote:
 
The metal detector at the airport went crazy as soon as Chachamaru walked through it.

"I have a medical license, " she explained for the officials' benefit. "My special condition forces me to have metal implanted all through my body."

The security inspector took a good long look at the license, then said, "It says you're a robot."

Chachamaru nodded. "Yes. That is my medical condition."

Chisame facepalmed.

Calmly, the inspector placed a tag on Chachamaru's forehead. "You'll have to pay an extra fee for additional lugagge, " he told Negi.

"Chachamaru isn't luggage!" Negi was quick to protest.

"Do you happen to have any cages with kittens as part of the luggage, sir?" Chachamaru asked the inspector.

He checked the list again. "Actually, yes, three of them, but why..."

She smiled. "I'll have no objections as long as I am placed next to them."

—-

"— and that's why they pulled her out in an oversized bag, " Negi explained Nekane.

"Ahhhh, now it all becomes perfectly clear..."
What is the point anymore?
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Cygnus
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Konoka of the Dark

To be honest, I'm not sure what I want to do. It's a bit frustrating when all your good ideas all amount to

1. Stare at GHQ for five minutes
2. Cook up some KonoSetsu story
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Cygnus
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Konoka of the Dark

Now look, you jerks made number two win.

Unstoppable Foe
Quote:
 
I still remember that fearsome day.

There were a hundred of us and only one of her. A mere halfling who happened to have a rather dangerous sword.

We fought her tooth and nail, coming up with every attack in the book and a few that weren't, but that damnable halfling, that Setsuna Sakurazaki, was too much of a dangerous warrior. Sword techniques even our best swords-oni could use didn't hold a candle to her onslaught.

Not even five minutes later, 99 corpses and my tired body hit the ground. We stood no chance. She didn't gloat, sneer, or even look disdainful. Her stare only warned us that the next time would be even less merciful than the last. I quaked in fear--there was a monster who was not only greater than myself, but lacked the raw, obvious evil along with it. There was no stopping her.

But then there was an act of mercy. "Oh SECCHAN~!"

"O-ojou-sama?!" Her face twisted from harsh warrior to embarrassed school girl at the drop of a hat when another beautiful woman appeared. She looked completely harmless... why even our imps could probably have kidnapped that one. "I-I'm finished over here. Please be careful, there's no telling what other demons might be around for."

"Oh, those guys? I sent them back already~" This brunette couldn't possibly be powerful... could she? "Anyway, you didn't call me Kono-chan like you were supposed to! You know what that means~"

"I-I'm sorry," Setsuna immediately apologized.

"Punishment time~!" A fair silk rope, one that was probably softer and more easily broken than the sharp wire some of our soldiers used went around the halfling's wrists--and she couldn't even break them.

..scratch that. "If you get out of that, you'll make me very sad."

"Wait, Oj--Kono-chan, please reconsider!" Setsuna pleaded as she used the rest of the silk length to drag off her... apparent pet. "This is embarrassing! If I'm tied up like this people will see!" That brunette apparently thought little of her protests and silenced her with a kiss. The almighty, terrifying warrior that had slain us not sixty seconds earlier had effectively been kidnapped by a mere magical girl.

I couldn't resist lifting a tired finger and simply going, "HA HA!" at that halfling as she was dragged away. The strangely pleasant glare I got from her captor chilled me to the bone, but I didn't care.



"...and that, my children, was how I got the last laugh against the great and terrifying Setsuna Sakurazaki."

"Hey uncle Nelson," the younger demon asked his uncle. "Do you realize that this was the third time you told this story in the last hour?"
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rikalous
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Creature of the Deep

Wait, you actually wanted someone to tell you "pick the option that involves writing something over the option that doesn't?" I thought you were just venting.
Let's Watch Nanoha
Wits, magic, and hardboiled monologues.
My other claims to fame.
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Cygnus
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Konoka of the Dark

I was just being facetious, really. I wrote the above on a whim.
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OverMaster
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Oboy. Whee.

One Reasonable Facsimile.

Quote:
 
"Asuna-san, Master, look, look!" Negi eagerly ushered them in. "I finally found Father! Behold!"

And he grandly gestured towards the guy stuffing his mouth in their kitchen. The guy looked lazily at them, waved a bit with a hand, and swallowed a huge mouthful.

Eva's eyes became golden on black, and ice began flowing around her hands. "You got the wrong man, you idiot..."

"Oh..." Negi sank back into sadness.

Even as he flew through the window encased in ice, Shishido Jinbei considered it had been a fair price for such a good free meal.
What is the point anymore?
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Shadow Crystal Mage
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OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!

Given the many Negi-look-alikes we soon see, It's a wonder this didn't happen sooner.
I AM THE OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!!!!!!
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OverMaster
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Oboy. Whee.

When Did It All Go Wrong?

Quote:
 
"But at some point between the start of the century and the Great Crisis, Japan started suffering from serious problems that led to its downfall, " Yukihime narrated. "Men started becoming pushovers who kept clumsily tumbling into women when they were naked, then cried in terror and bled through their noses to death. Women became shrill, irrational and jealous harpies who only focused on the wimpiest of the males, only to pummel them to death for the most fleeting of reasons. No one ever dared to confess their feelings to anyone else, no one wanted to listen to anyone else's explanations on anything, and everyone got stuck with teenaged mentalities. Everyone above thirty became evil, shadowy conspirators who ultimately only talked in confusing vague babble while sending children to do everything for them. Half of the women became completely unable to cook even the simplest meals, and almost all of the men became unable to even grasp the notion of cooking or do chores for themselves. Plagued by so many crippling social conflicts, Japan descended into chaos and anarchy, and most of its population was wiped off during The Great Baka Civil War. Horrible times, simply horrible, " she shook her head in somber disapproval.
Karin, Kuromaru and Touta all gasped quietly.

"And... what caused all of that?" asked Touta. "Did you get to learn the reasons, or...?"

"Japan just watched far too much anime and read too much manga. It was at that time we nailed Haruna to a cross and kicked her down a cliff. I still can hear, at times, her vicious laughter as she fell..."
What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Oboy. Whee.

Fairy Fail.

Quote:
 
All in all, things hadn't gone the way Homura had expected them to. It wasn't like she resented or disliked her husband, but often, he got very exhasperating, his friends were idiots and lunatics for the most part (except the redhead, who was just freaking scary), and he was far from the cool stoic Fate-sama had been.

Still...

After she stopped pumping her flames down his throat, the pink haired boy patted his stomach and smiled widely. "Ahhhh! No one makes fire like you, Homura-chan!" he complimented, wiping his goofily grinning lips with a napkin.

Even now, Homura blushed slighly. "Oh, you cheap flatterer, " she groaned.

The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Even if it's a scorched one.
What is the point anymore?
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