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The All Purpose Negima Fanfiction Thread Backup Redux; In case TvTropes shuts down forums. may we never have to use this.
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Topic Started: Apr 6 2012, 07:22 PM (12,386 Views)
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rikalous
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Dec 31 2013, 07:32 PM
Post #421
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Creature of the Deep
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Heh. Clever.
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Let's Watch Nanoha Wits, magic, and hardboiled monologues. My other claims to fame.
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OverMaster
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Dec 31 2013, 08:09 PM
Post #422
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Oboy. Whee.
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Your Time has Passed.
"Hey, Asuna. Have you tried a Google Image Search with your name lately?" Haruna asked her.
So she did.
And scrolled down.
And down.
And down.
And further down.
Asuna crunched the mouse in her hand. "DAMN YOU, SWORD ART ONLINE!"
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Jan 1 2014, 01:08 PM
Post #423
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Oboy. Whee.
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Negi and Gretel.
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Even in the then current Wales hillside, it wasn't uncommon to find Witches, renegade mage users isolated from society, living in the woods where a boy often would sneak alone to train himself, or to place himself in danger so his father could return from the grave to save him. So, after Negi vanished that night, Nekane was not terribly surprised when she found his tracks led her to a foul smelling shack in the wilderness.
The normally sweet young woman, without a hint of hesitation, wand at the ready, kicked the sole door down. Sure enough, Negi was naked and kept inside of a tight rusty cage, his face dirty with forcefed leftovers of the same animal canned food that littered the floor around the cage.
With a shrill, hideous scream, the still young but clearly unkept and insane woman tried tackling Nekane, only waving her own wand as an afterthought. Such an attack costed her dearly, since Nekane, as soon as she entered, had started casting, and in a moment, an arrow of light pierced through the woman's eyesocket, exiting through the back of her skull.
Sighing, Nekane stepped past the twitching fallen body, freed Negi from his cage, hugged him tightly, and readied the amnesia spell. For a moment, she almost felt tempted to let him remember, just this once. That would at least keep him scared and out of the dangerous woods...
But then, hearing him weep, she told herself that, of course, couldn't be allowed to happen.
By the time Negi was sent to Merdiana, Nekane Springfield already had erradicated all Witches in the Council Area. Something not even the Holy Inquisition had managed.
She wasn't particularly proud of the fact, and somehow, she managed to keep it a secret from Negi until her death...
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Jan 3 2014, 12:39 PM
Post #424
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Oboy. Whee.
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An Unequally Rational and Emotional 2014 Special.
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"So, Hakase, " Chisame said conversationally over the breakfast table she was sharing with Satomi, Negi and Chamo, "what's your big resolution for this new year?"
"Oh, I've decided I'll get back to work on our life story! It feels like I have been spinning in the same place for months now. Granted, it is a reasonable pleasant and gratifying moment in my life, but even so, my emotional development craves for a shift ahead in our lifestyles!"
Chisame blinked. "You realize there's nothing we can do about it, don't you? We're stuck in the same place until the author decides to write more."
"What?" Negi choked on his orange juice. "And, and, when will that happen?"
Chisame shrugged. "Who knows? But from what I've read online, it might not happen until someone named 'Akamatsu Ken' ends something called 'UQ Holder' and resumes something else called 'Mahou Sensei Negima'."
"Huh, that last title... sounds strangely familiar..." Chamo hummed.
They kept eating in thoughtful silence afterwards.
Then Chisame said, "I'm never reaching college, am I?"
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Jan 5 2014, 07:35 AM
Post #425
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Oboy. Whee.
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Albert Chamomille: Mystery Incorporated.
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---
''And... do you have any pesky, bratty nephews? Dumb hilbilly cousins? A drug addiction issue?" the TV executive asked.
"Uhh... none at all!" the ermine said.
The TV executive smiled. "You're hired!"
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While driving through the country skipping important classes and tests like always, which might help explaining while we haven't graduated for the last four decades or so, we arrived to Uncle Dudley's old motel.
"Oboy, a motel!" Chamo perked up, his tiny black nose twitching. "I love motels! They are so... ahhh, romantic, yeah, that's the word..."
"And, like, room service sometimes is even decent!" Shaggy licked his lips aloud.
After a brief dry stare, Chamo slapped him.
"Enough of that, guys, " Fred said while parking the Mystery Machine. "Gang, I smell a mystery afoot here!"
"Oh, Freddy, whatever makes you think that?" asked Daphne.
"Maybe it has something to do with the screams of panic and windows being shattered in the upper floors?" I asked, looking up.
"Oh, yes, of course! Freddy, you're so smart!" Daphne said. I knew better by now than to make any comments.
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Uncle Dudley paced around with his hands behind his back. I hadn't seen him that rattled since... well, never. We have all these relatives across the country who we never knew before, until we happen to visit them and learn of their problems with ghosts, leprechauns, werewolves, Slime monsters, Kosmo Entelekheia members, demons, demon gods, guys in stupid masks, revived cavemen or vampires. Sometimes I wonder what's up with that.
"It's terrible, Velma! The ghost of Norma Slates keeps scaring my clients away! They are even resorting to doing it in their cars, or at their homes while their parents are away! At this rate, I'll be out of business before two months!"
"Zoinks! But, uh, like, what is that 'doing it' you're talking about?" asked Shaggy.
"Ask your mother, " Fred told him before rubbing his chin, a glint in his eyes. "This sure sounds mysterious and challenging! Okay, we'll take the case!"
"But we're getting paid this time!!" Chamo protested.
I nodded. "I concur. I know money just keeps magically appearing in the back of our van after every time Shaggy eats our budget out, in a way that surely isn't related at all with his peddling drugs across our trips, since we all know he'd NEVER do that, but... what if he ever dies of an overdose?"
"Like, I don't have an idea what are you talking about at all, Velma, but I'm sure glad you think that way!" Shaggy nodded.
"C'mon, Velma!" Fred said. "He's your own uncle! How could you demand payment from him?"
"I had never met him before, " I said, while Daphne looked at herself in a mirror in the background, and was pulled away by mysterious hands AGAIN.
"Oh well, we'll discuss that later!" Freddy said. "For now, the most important thing is splitting up and looking for clues! Shaggy, you go with Chamo! Velma, since it seems Daphne has been kidnapped AGAIN while we weren't looking, you'll come with me!"
"Hey, Freddy-bro, wait!" Chamo whined. "How comes I never get to go with the babes and you wander around with Shaggy-bro here!"
Fred casually stepped on him.
"Good argument, " Chamo said under the foot. "Even so, I'm not going in there to become a walking target! It's too dangerous!"
"Yeah, like, what if I stay in the Mystery Machine looking after the stash... I mean, monitoring the area if the ghost comes out or something?"
I sighed and pulled the box. "Would you do it for a Chamo Snack?"
"GIMME!" Shaggy drooled.
"Why the heck do you insist calling those awful things by my name?" Chamo protested. "I'd never do it! No! Not for all the snacks in the world!"
I sighed again, reached under my sweater, unhooked what there was underneath, and pulled it out. "Would you do it for my bra?"
"GIMME!!!!" Chamo drooled.
"Like, you're weird, man, " Shaggy told him.
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While wandering around the same recycled animation halls over and over, Shaggy's teeth chattered. "I'm like nervous, Chamo! What if that ghost gets us? I'm too young for my forty years to die!"
"Relax!" Chamo smiled, sitting on his head. "My extraordinary sense of smell for the magical tells me there's nothing supernatural in this old, decadent place! The only danger is to be brutally murdered by the madman staging this far out scare farce, who probably will be willing to kill us messily before going to jail!"
"Yeah, right! And b-besides, it's like Fred says, magic doesn't exist... Right...?"
"Shaggy-bro... Don't you remember Zombie Island? Or the Thirteen Ghosts? Or the Lovecraftian entity who was going to eat the world?"
"Like, not too well, Chamo... You know the... uhh, Chamo Snacks play tricks with my memory at times..."
Suddenly, Chamo perked up. "Shaggy-bro! Behind that door!"
"GAH!" Shaggy jumped back. "Don't kill me! Like, get the ermine first!"
"No, it's not that!" the ermine rushed for a door, twitching his nose. "That smell...!"
He pulled the door open to smile at the scene happening inside...
Negi gently caressed Arika's face as he took her from behind...
They stopped to stare bluntly at Chamo. Whistling, he took some pictures and kicked the door back closed.
"Like, what was that at all?" asked a confused Shaggy.
"Ask your mother, " Chamo said, pocketing his mini-camera back into his fur. "I told ya this place was decadent. Hey, Shaggy-bro, you finally get it? You're starting to drool at the idea, and I'm glad, but don't do it on me, you"
"It, it, it isn't me, man!" Shaggy trembled, pointing at the lurching ghost hovering behind them...
Chamo turned around. "Oh. I hate it when this happens."
"YAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Chamo and Shaggy ran, kickstarting a groovy music-themed chase scene.
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"Like, this is the end, man!" Shaggy cried as he and Chamo were cornered. "I love you like the brother I never had! So I have a confession to make! I sell drugs to make my ends meet, and feed that destructive, poisonous, deadly addiction of mine... JUNK FOOD!"
"... uhhh, everyone knew that already, Shaggy-bro."
"Like, really?"
"Well, maybe not Daphne-sis. I think she still believes those are packs of flour. Anyway, I die with no regrets except... except..." He sniffed. "Wait, that smell! I understand it now! I've solved the case!"
"Like, what?"
"GRRRRYYYAHAHHHHHH!" the ghost shrieked as it advanced towards them.
"Hoo-hoo-hoooo! BANZAIIIII!" Chamo cried joyfully, as he leapt on the ghost...
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"We heard the commotion while, uh, finding valuable clues on the mystery, guys!" Fred said, rushing it while zipping his pants up. I trailed behind fixing my hair back. Jinkies indeed. It's better without that Blake bitch around. "What did you find Oh, shit, I didn't get to lay a trap this time..."
"I caught the culprit, Freddy-bro!" Chamo proudly said, sitting on top of the wailing ghost. "Behold, the face under the mask of this ghost! It's" and he pulled the hideous ghost's face off, revealing a cute pale head with long white hair. "Another ghost!"
"Another ghost?" Uncle Dudley asked, also coming closer while wiping his hands off, a roll of toilet paper under an arm.
"Yes! After my series was cancelled, I wandered around with no purpose! I tried to do what real ghosts did, and scare people, but it never worked! People gets scared at Casper-kun for some reason, but I never could scare anyone! They just pointed at me, laughed at how much my epilogue sucked, and left my self-esteem lower than ever! While this... this... Chamo-san got himself a steady job! That's why I set a trap for him, but not even that worked! WAHHHHHHHH!"
"An old colleague?" I asked Chamo.
He nodded, putting her ghost panties on top of my bra on his head. "Yeah. I have seen what cancellations do to men, women and schoolgirls. It pushes them to do horrible, horrible things... When you're eighteen, I'll tell you about what happened to Akira-chan..."
"I'm forty-five by now! By the way, where's Daphne?"
"Uhhh, I dunno. We never found her... But I'm sure she's in a better place now!"
Negi gently caressed Daphne's face as he took her from behind, and Arika from the front...
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NEXT CHAPTER: Guest starring Batman and Robin!
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What is the point anymore?
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Shadow Crystal Mage
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Jan 5 2014, 04:40 PM
Post #426
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OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!
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Ambrant Arandel is writing a sequel to A Day Indoors... set in UQ Holder...
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I AM THE OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!!!!!!
  wwwtorcom/images/stories/blogs/12_09/wot_fb_mat.jpg
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OverMaster
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Jan 5 2014, 06:38 PM
Post #427
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Oboy. Whee.
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I left him a review. It was a decent effort, but I dislike the 'Setsuna had to change her gender and identity to be with Konoka' plot point. Unfortunate Implications ahoy!
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Jan 6 2014, 02:41 PM
Post #428
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Oboy. Whee.
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Birds and Bees. But mostly, Birds. With very long beaks.
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"Negi, it is time for you to learn from where do babies come, " Takahata said, with a hand on his shoulder. "They are delivered by a magical stork."
Negi blinked, then said, "Really, Takamichi, I think you should consider me able to figure out by now that is a"
"No, no, it's real! We are in a Shonen manga, after all! That means no one ever really gets to have sex, since most people never confesses to anyone else, the romantic tension is almost always completely unsolved, and even those who get to marry later part ways to spend their time very far from each other and their children. Under those circumstances, there is no way the human race could have kept itself going until the present day."
Negi blinked again. "Oh. Oh, I see. Well... then please tell me how I could leave Konoka pregnant?"
Takahata shrugged. "Who knows? You're always breaking the rules of magic...!"
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What is the point anymore?
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Shadow Crystal Mage
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Jan 6 2014, 03:12 PM
Post #429
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OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!
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Great punchline!
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I AM THE OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!!!!!!
  wwwtorcom/images/stories/blogs/12_09/wot_fb_mat.jpg
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Shadow Crystal Mage
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Jan 8 2014, 06:58 PM
Post #430
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OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!
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With regards to Out of Control... I think we better start a new rotation. I'll write the next chapter, 22. Whose next after me?
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I AM THE OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!!!!!!
  wwwtorcom/images/stories/blogs/12_09/wot_fb_mat.jpg
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OverMaster
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Jan 11 2014, 08:04 PM
Post #431
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Oboy. Whee.
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You're no Hachin.
On their way back from the orphanage, they saw a white ermine sitting near the train station.
Karin briefly stopped and told the small animal, "Why do you keep doing this, Chamomile-san? You know he'll never come back."
The ermine fairy made a slight sound with his tongue. "Just let an old guy enjoy his manias, Nee-chan. Hey, you got any cigarettes?"
Karin tossed him one. "Here."
"Thank you. Hey, who's the boy? And the..." he sniffed, "... ohhh, I was fooled for a moment. Anyway, he kinda reminds me of..."
"Ask Yukihime-sama. She's back, " Karin said dryly before starting to walk away.
Touta blinked, then followed her, Kuromaru in tow. "Hey, who's the"
"Ask Yukihime-sama!"
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Sorry to Disappoint!
Negi Springfield, downtrodden, defeated, depressed, sits sunken into an old, smelly couch in a dark, dirty, dingy room, watching TV.
" and in other anime news, this Winter season will see the debut of a brand new series adapting Mahou Sens!"
Negi Springfield perks up, life flowing back into him, eyes sparkling with revived interest.
" Mahou Sensou!" the TV has just said.
Negi Springfield, downtrodden, defeated, depressed, sinks back into his old, smelly couch in a dark, dirty, dingy room, watching TV.
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Jan 12 2014, 06:04 PM
Post #432
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Oboy. Whee.
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The Nutcracker.
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That Christmas, young Negi was given a mysterious light-green haired doll by his godmother Evangeline. She said it was the Nutcracker Princess, and that he would do better to take good care of her. However, Negi's sister Asuna was not thrilled her brother was supposed to be playing with dolls now, so she broke it, for his own manhood's sake.
Negi was terribly shaken, and fixed the Nutcracker Princess as best as he could. That night, near twelve o'clock, after the festivities were over, the Shotacon Mouse Queen and her cohorts showed up at Negi's bedroom to kidnap him and probably do bestiality underage things we can't mention here. However, the Nutcracker Princess came to life and easily dispatched the Mouse Queen and her forces with her wide collection of sharp weaponry.
Charmed by the Nutcracker Princess' courage and fighting prowesses, Negi went to her, smithen, dreaming of being taken by her to wondrous snowy lands of classical music and magical sights.
Instead, she grinned and cracked his nuts.
Asuna peeked in. "See, I told you it was for your manhood's sake!"
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Jan 13 2014, 01:33 PM
Post #433
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Oboy. Whee.
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What If Negi Had Been Adopted By...?
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She wasn't that much older than the child she was holding, yet her grip on him a strong and steady as she lifted the bawling boy for the others to see.
"So, Nagi Springfield's son..." she pondered. "Yes, I met him once. Strong man. Not too bright, but still better than most of what we have around here..." she said, coldly looking towards the gulping Natsu and Gray. Then, looking back at the baby, she smiled. "Well, since the fabled Ala Rubra can't take care of a comrade's child, we won't be as low as them. The debt Fairy Tail had to the Thousand Master will be paid through our newest member, Nagi Springfield!"
And that was how Ezra Scarlet had her son.
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A baby boy from another world.
A crash on a Kansas farm.
The man approached the small capsule forged from a strange alloy of metals. Appropiate, he thought, as he lifted the baby from its insides, holding him high for his parents to see.
"Clark!" his mother said with awe. "Is he...?"
"Human, " her son said after a quick X-Ray scan. He looked up at the nocturnal skies, his gaze quickly locking on a particular celestial body. "I can track a trail of an unknown energy... magical, probably... from Mars to here. I'll ask Dr. Fate and J'onn. Maybe they know something."
And he smiled, holding the boy against his chest. "But in the meanwhile, I think this a job for Ma Kent."
Doomsday, Bizarro, Luthor, Brainiac, he could take. For dirty diapers, he still defered to a higher power.
And that was how Clark Kent had his son.
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She frowned.
Just from holding him, she could see he was strong. Powerful genetics, most likely. A survivor. He had to be, judging from the carnage she had taken him from.
Even the strogest couldn't live forever. She would need a heir, much like her mother needed her. And since she was not going to submit herself to a man to gain a son, perhaps making this boy into a real man would be a side project worth her time.
"Negi, " she repeated the name she had read from his blankets. "For now, you will be the mascot of the Honnoji Academy's Student Council! But from there, you WILL rise to further greatness!!"
And that was how Kiryuin Satsuki had her son.
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Jan 13 2014, 06:38 PM
Post #434
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Oboy. Whee.
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What If Negi had been Adopted by Frank Castle?
Raising him along their own children gave further peace to Castle's inner demons. With their help, he all but forgot the blood soaked days in the jungle, the stench of death and war, the memories of tortured nights killing and maiming just to survive...
Then, that fateful day at Central Park, Negi was gunned down with Frank's own kids and wife, so in the end, nothing actually changed for him, compared with the core timeline...
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What if Negi had been Adopted by Lyra Heartstrings?
Miss Cheerilee assumed a serious pose behind her desk.
"Miss Lyra, Negi is an excellent, well behaved and very smart colt, but there are several things about him that concern me. We often catch him walking only on his hind legs, he somehow seems to make all fillies fight over his attentions even without meaning to, and not to be rude, but I have started suspecting he's actually another sort of creature under a homemade pony costume..."
"You found the zipper, didn't you?" Lyra asked.
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What is the point anymore?
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OverMaster
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Jan 16 2014, 09:50 AM
Post #435
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Oboy. Whee.
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How Negi Met His End (Despite Being Immortal)
- Quote:
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He wished he still could go to Konoka for things like this. But Konoka was gone as well now, and... no, he had to stop thinking about that. It still hurt too much.
He rubbed his nose as the nurse gently ushered him in. "Thank you, " he bowed his head, and she quietly swooned, because he still had it. Well, that, and right now, he had a hideous case of the flu as well, contracted from one of his latest trips recruiting help for the Blue Mars project. The flu, of course, couldn't actually endanger him, even if it was a strange virulent exotic variant, but he couldn't become a spreader for his co-workers. So it was better to take care of it as soon as possible, then get back to work.
The doctor had a very wide smile. His skin was oddly yellow, and he only had four fingers in each hand. Mundus Magicus held a wide variety of peculiar humanoid races, after all. His office smelled rather funny, as well, in ways Negi had never caught from a doctor's premises, but he figured out different races had different medical ways. He almost had forgotten, since it had been too long since the last time he even needed a check-up.
"Good afternoon, Mr. Springfield!" the man told him cherfully, shaking his hand. "I'm Doctor Nick Riviera!"
"Hello, Doctor Nick!" Negi smiled back, too trustful to notice the odd calligraphy on the diploma hanging above the physician's head.
He wasn't worried at all. Even in the worst of cases, what could possibly go wrong?
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What is the point anymore?
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