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Unequally Rational And Emotional Thread; It's Negima with Everything Else Added!
Topic Started: Apr 15 2012, 06:40 PM (11,726 Views)
IAmNotCreativeEnough
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Yes. Depending on the extent of the mind control, you should also be capable of controlling the entirety of the body from the brain...
rikalous wrote
 
Yes I am. I said I would, and I hate going back on my word. IANCE, you pustulating whoreson, I am going to find you when this is over. They will make a torture porn movie about your death, and they will have to tone it down to maintain suspension of disbelief.

Shadow Crystal Mage wrote
 
There there. Go do evil things in the name of the government to feel better.


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OverMaster
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Nocturnal Visitations

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They were actually moving faster now they had left the city and reached the woods. The two Sailor Senshi, now they had to worry less about being seen, could move around with more freedom, and although they had to jump between trees now instead of the more stable rooftops, that didn't seem to affect their mobility that much, to Yuuna's surprise.

It was obvious Akira was a complete ignorant about the area, but Pluto-san seemed to have a solid idea of where she was leading them to, and they moved quick and swiftly, gaining ground considerably fast. Until Sailor Pluto stopped all of a sudden, looking up a hill. "Oh, Gods."

"What happened?" Yuuna followed her gaze up, and she and Akira gasped at the same time. They were looking at a luxury traditional villa in the mountains, with smoke and flashes of lightning coming from several random points at quick intervals. It seemed to be substaining heavy amounts of damage from the inside, as if shaken by intense superhuman combat that caused loud rumbling sounds, audible even downhill.

The worst part, however, was it was completely surrounded by dozens and dozens, probably reaching into the hundreds, of grotesque demonic looking creatures.

"Youma, " Akira whispered. "B-But, so many of them in a single place..."

"They aren't Youma. They're real demons, not simple hellspawn from the Dark Agency, " Pluto hissed.

Yuuna scratched her head. "Aren't hellspawn and demons the same thing?"

"In our field, we call hellspawn beings artificially created through hellish procedures, either from scratch or by transforming a human being, " Pluto lectured like an experienced professor. "Demons are naturally born denizens from Hell."

"You know, I'm actually sorry I asked, " Yuuna confessed.

Akira started going uphill. "The people there is going to be massacred! We have to help them!"

"Who lives there, anyway?" asked Yuuna.

"That's the home of your classmate Konoka's family, " Pluto explained as she went up along Mercury. "If my guess is correct, the enemy has jumped the gun and attacked your teacher and friends at their stronghold..."

Akira and Yuuna turned twin horrified stares at her.

"Negi-sensei?-!" Akira gasped.

"Konoka?-!" Yuuna yelled.

"Negi-sensei is in danger!" Akira hastened her pace up the hill, her brow furrowing fearsomely.

"That huge villa is really Konoka's?-!" Yuuna was gawking. "Man, I'd skin kitties to be a part of that family!"

"Don't make me drop you down, " Akira said. She sounded actually serious. Yuuna prefered not finding out if it was because Akira feared for her safety up there or if she had finally found her breaking point, so she fell silent.

Ritsuko actually half smiled at that, despite everything else.
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IAmNotCreativeEnough
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Wait, isn't that one of Evangeline's titles?
rikalous wrote
 
Yes I am. I said I would, and I hate going back on my word. IANCE, you pustulating whoreson, I am going to find you when this is over. They will make a torture porn movie about your death, and they will have to tone it down to maintain suspension of disbelief.

Shadow Crystal Mage wrote
 
There there. Go do evil things in the name of the government to feel better.


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Amused to Death

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Keiichi tried to gather Ayaka, Sora, Makie and Nodoka behind himself as best as he could despite his own terror. Ayaka, however, had slipped past him to go tend a coughing and gasping Roberta, and Nodoka had, while the Joker ranted, reached for a Clow Card, keeping it at hand but unable to activate it without alerting the newcomers. The boy had proved he was fast enough to strike her down before she could use her powers, so something had to buy time for her first, or else, she reasoned, she'd get nothing but being the first one to fall. Konoeko stood close to them, her small sticks slightly pointed towards the mismatched invaders.

It was difficult for her to predict their movements. Her Pactio relied on short term future reading in combat. Normally, it complemented Eishun's sword skills, allowing him to anticipate any enemy's movements and cover every angle in battle. However, it was difficult to use it against enemies who were much faster in reactions than her, which was one of the reasons why she had left the scene of the fight against the Doll Master. The same seemed to be true of the boy, the way she had troubles even following his upcoming reactions when he still was only staying still waiting for a command to kill. He seemed antsy and eager, which wasn't a good omen at all. Was the American the actually less trigger happy one of the duo? At least he seemed contented with just toying with them for the moment.

The clown's actions, while much slower, were even harder to predict for some reason. Probably because of how erratic they were. Konoeko had a really hard time understanding what he was going to do next, even to the subtlest motions of his gloved hands.

"Okay, organization is important, " he said, casually tossing the guard aside. Konoeko caught him in her arms quickly, and whispered support when he weakly apologized to her. "A task for everyone, so let's start voting on roles. I nominate myself as the one who will kill all of you, I mean, all but Quarty, who is debatably not even really alive since he's a doll."

"Puppet, " Quartum icily corrected.

Joker waved a hand at him and looked at Keiichi analytically. "Lame. Unfunny even at first sight. Even a bullet between the eyes is a waste of ammo. Frankly, my boy, I don't see what you can contribute to a comedy show, unless you're the Butt Monkey, but we'd have to establish a previous running gag with you, and we're short on time. Give some more material to work with. What do you do for a living?"

"M-Mechanics, " Keiichi stammered.

"Mechanics, " Joker repeated. "If we had a car, we could run you over. That'd be funny. Maybe we can keep you alive until we hit the garages. Do they have garages here? Who am I kidding, this place is so backwater I doubt you even know bicycles..."

Ruri's voice sounded in his earpiece. "What's that I'm hearing? Do you have more hostages there?"

Joker grunted, annoyed. "Look, Ruri-Ruri, why don't you go to bed already, or to watch TV, or to eat tuna sandwiches and cookies? We can handle everything from here ourselves..."

"Don't waste your time there, idiots, " Ruri said. "We're on a schedule. We—"

Joker turned the tiny device off. "Good night, Ruri Ruri!"

The device turned itself back on immediately. "Don't try tuning me out. I programmed these myself, remember? And don't try taking them off either. Or I'll abort mission and give an alert signal."

Joker blinked. "What? You can't blow the whistle on our own operation!"

"Help!" Makie cried. A terrified Sora covered her mouth just as soon.

"Was that a girl?" Ruri asked. "You promised me you wouldn't kill women or children. Leave them alone."

"You believed I'd keep a promise I made? And you call me the idiotic one?-!" Joker was aghast.

"Keep them alive or I'll contact the police. I have a direct line from here, " Ruri warned.

"I'd activate your bomb, " Joker warned back.

"I don't care. Besides, we know how our relationship will end up in any case, regardless."

Joker tapped on his forehead with his fingers. "Your girlfriend's a tough negotiator, " he told Quartum.

"I'd never have a girlfriend that bitchy, " the construct replied.

"I heard that, idiot, " Ruri said.

Roberta finally could struggle back to her feet with Ayaka's help. Never before, not even that time she fought that insane Revy woman, she had been hit that hard, and that boy had only flicked her with his thin fingers. That... thing... definitely wasn't human.

"Are... Are you...?" Ayaka asked nervously.

She nodded and stood straight, taking her glasses off and handing them to her young mistress. "I'm going serious from now on, Ojou-sama. I'll try to distract them so you can escape. No matter what, never look back, okay?" she whispered, hissing each word under her breath.

Ayaka tried to protest at that, but Roberta placed a hand on her mouth.

"Decisions, decisions, decisions, " Joker paced around before them. "I tell you, Quarty, they don't call women our ball and chain for nothing. Next time we're going without mission control. Why, back in my day, we didn't have anything of that and we did just fine. Okay, let's think out of the box, fellas. The Censor Committee has problems with me killing you, but obviously, I can't let you walk away without any care in the world. A reputation to keep, a joke quota to fill, and all that. And just knocking you out is sooooooo lame! So, any ideas on a common ground to reach?"

Keiichi blinked. "Are you really asking us that?"

"No, Genius, I'm asking you if you want pork or fish for dinner, " the clown sneered. "Anyone with a smart suggestion? You, the blondie! You're the one who was stripped today by those dummies, aren't you? Good to see modern youth still keeps itself in shape, and what a shape." At that, Roberta almost jumped for his throat, but Ayaka somehow held her back. "Whoa, keep a lash on that dog, will you? And have it vaccinated while you're on it. Anyway, what's your take on this?"

Makie hummed. "Well... Normally, in cartoons, when they want to show a villain is very bad but they can't show him killing people, they have him putting the heroes into unescapable death traps instead!"

Joker's head quickly snapped aside to look at her.

"Ah!" he grinned after an initial shock. "We've found the brains of the party!"

Makie looked up at him. "For real?"

"Not really, no..." Ayaka muttered, screeching her teeth together.

"Of course!" Joker patted Makie's shoulders. "That's a great classic idea! I'm glad I thought of it the exact second before you voiced it! Pinky, you'd have a real future in super villainy if you had a future at all! Quarty, be a gentleman and implement the smart little lady's proposal!"

"I'm not going to set a stupid giant blender for you, or anything like that, " Quartum folded his arms.

Joker sighed grandly. "Maybe I should trade you for Pinky here. Just burn everything around them, bird brain!"

Quartum's eyes literally lit up like hellish bonfires. "Now you're talking my language!"

"I'm not sure I can approve of this either—" Ruri began, but then her words were drowned by the boom of exploding flames in all directions.
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IAmNotCreativeEnough
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Now I want to see a Joker/Makie fic...
rikalous wrote
 
Yes I am. I said I would, and I hate going back on my word. IANCE, you pustulating whoreson, I am going to find you when this is over. They will make a torture porn movie about your death, and they will have to tone it down to maintain suspension of disbelief.

Shadow Crystal Mage wrote
 
There there. Go do evil things in the name of the government to feel better.


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Omakes.

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The Secret Origin of the Unequally Rational and Emotional Human Race

From the Secret Files of Akagi Ritsuko, Sailor Pluto


In my first mission to the dawn of mankind after taking the role from Meioh Setsuna, I traveled to the deepest Dark Africa to save a couple of humanoid anthropoids and their child, the first being in this planet qualifiable as an actual human, from a vile and insidious scheme of the Dark Kingdom.

Ritsuko looked down with stupified horror at the ghastly scene under her.

I succeeded at destroying the Negaverse General at charge, but not before mankind had paid the ultimate price ever before coming to be...

The father humanoid looked down at the remains in the bottom of the rock pit as well, staring without understanding. He scratched his head before turning his attention at Ritsuko and curiously tugging at the edge of her Sailor Fuku skirt.

With no choices left, I had to make the ultimate sacrifice to guarantee the future existence of mankind...

Ritsuko sighed sadly and began pulling her top up.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Now. Actually, a few weeks before the current chapter of URAE:

"— And that's why it took me so long to come back, " Ritsuko explained Luna. "I had to make sure he'd grow up into an able man."

Luna stared at her with dumbfounded horror.

Ritsuko blushed and rasped, looking aside. "You looked well after the apartment in my absence, I see. I was worried, since you have no hands, but you even kept the windows clean..."

"So you... and then..." Luna babbled.

Ritsuko nodded.

The cat sighed and drooped her head. "So that's the real reason why mankind is so messed up."

"Look at the bright side. Had you sent any iteration of Uranus and Neptune, there wouldn't be a human race at all now..."

The Secret Origin of Unequally Rational and Emotional Lancer

Bazette Fraga Mc Kremitz looked down at the bonafide crime (although it had been no crime) scene in the middle of the room she had used for the summoning.

"Are you alive?" she asked aloud.

He didn't move.

"What kind of Servant, " the beautiful woman in the business suit with the short red hair wondered, "falls impaling himself through the chest with a simple lamp upon being summoned?"

Now the handsome black haired man in dark blue moved, lifting himself up and pulling the lamp out of the bleeding gap in his chest with a single tug. With a world of aplomb and suaveness, he said, "This is nothing but the gentlest of scratches. You summoned me as a Lancer, didn't you? Well, this is a common trait that seems to plague our class. Apparently someone believes it's funny."

"Uh..."

"Don't let that give you the wrong impression. Despite everything, you lucked out. Lancers are the best kind of Servants you can get, especially when that Lancer is me." He smiled, and his perfect white teeth made 'CLING!' for a moment.

Then the room's lights flickered back on. The ceiling's lamp sizzled, its support cables exploded, and it fell squarely on Lancer's head, showering Bazette with blood.

"This gag won't be into play when it's time for the dramatic life or death battles, will it?" she asked.

"... N-No, apparently they have a sense of timing for these things..."

"... Do you need some kind of attention for that?"

"L-Like I said, it's only a scratch..."

"I think that's part of your brains I'm seeing."

"It'll heal."

"But—"

"It'll heal."

The Secret Origin of Unequally Rational and Emotional Nekane Springfield

She thought of her stupid and despised but still so sexy brother in law all her wedding night long.

So, while Nekane technically wasn't Nagi's daughter, she kinda was, in spirit.

And that technique helped Mary all through her marriage.

In all fairness, Seoman also liked to imagine she was Arika.
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Hell to Pay

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Before Kotaro could jump ahead to attack, the rather distinctive-looking individual in red and black and sitting on the shoulders of the largest of all the demons cleared his throat loudly. "Your attention, pleeze! Kotaro, I know you can't wait to jump on that boy's bones, but let's introduce ourselves properly first, partially for the sake of those who've lost track of the story so far! The hunk I'm riding is named Kyle!"

"That... came out sounding really wrong..." Kyle said.

"And I'm Deadpool, Merc with a Mouth! Although you can't see it with this mask on, I guarantee you I have a mouth!" he put a gloved hand on his chest. "I'll be your main gratuitous cameo tonight! But don't worry, for those more in the mood for something more L*l*, we have Yami the Golden Darkness!" He gestured towards the stoic looking blond girl clad in black, standing on top of a demon turtle. "Say hello to our adoring public, Yami!"

"Call me by that name again and I'll kill you, " she dryly promised. "One second thought, just don't call me any way."

"Ah... yeah... And over here, we have the bird guy from the second Ranma movie, who finally got himself another gig!" Deadpool pointed at another demon standing next to Kyle, who seemed to be his second at command.

Haruna looked puzzled for a moment and opened her mouth to ask something, but just as soon, she closed it back shaking her head.

"What the home are you saying?" the masked bird demon asked. "I've never been in any movies! That's brain-rotting entertainment! Filmmakers are the real root of evil nowadays, I tell you!"

Kyle shook his head. "To think Lady Amagasaki would waste our time, summoning us here to fight a bunch of schoolgirls and a little boy with a wooden stick. It's a misuse of our might..."

"On the plus side, we get to see this world again, " another demon said. "I love this world. It's so full of hatred, prejudice, greed, fear and misery...!"

A collective dream sigh ran amongst the horde. Even Deadpool joined the sigh.

"Hey, we aren't all children!" Matoi protested. "We have Batman-sama with us, too!"

"We do?" Misa looked in all directions, not finding a trace of him.

"Crap! If the guy who is supposed to be the smartest of all superheroes slipped away before the fight starts, it's because we're hopelessly lost...!" Misora gulped.

"The Batman. Yeah, right, " the bird demon rolled his eyes. "As if we're going to believe such a ridiculous urban legend!"

There was a beat, as even the other demons looked critically at him.

The bird man feigned a cough. "Anyway, even if you're children, we won't go easy on you! We were hired for this, and we'll honor that contract to the letter! Plus, we're evil, you know. So don't curse us, and just be thankful none of us brought tentacles!"

The Harunas made matching disappointed faces.

The bird man noticed those. "What in the name of all that's unholy is wrong with you humans this century?"
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IAmNotCreativeEnough
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Awww, no Makie/Joker Omake. I iz sad.
rikalous wrote
 
Yes I am. I said I would, and I hate going back on my word. IANCE, you pustulating whoreson, I am going to find you when this is over. They will make a torture porn movie about your death, and they will have to tone it down to maintain suspension of disbelief.

Shadow Crystal Mage wrote
 
There there. Go do evil things in the name of the government to feel better.


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OverMaster
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That's what Clown Princesses is for.

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Taiga Doooojoooooo!

A short pettanko with long brown hair walks onstage, wearing Taiga's sparring clothes and carrying a boken. Evangeline is waiting for her there already, looking bored as hell and wearing the typical sports shorts and shirt.

"Then, who are you? I was waiting for that stupid Taiga-sensei to return already."

"I am Taiga! Aisaka Taiga! Star of Tora Dora, making my Unequally Rational and Emotional debut here, because I'm just that kickass and because Shadow Crystal Mage likes me!"

"Ah, great, right what we needed. And where's Fujimura, then?"

"I heard she still was out with her old fart boyfriend. But really, who cares?"

"Not me. Just asking."

"Fine. Everyone! Today, we've witnessed a few effective techniques of fighting against demons! However, to master those, you wimps must develop your scrawny and lardass bodies to true Ala Alba levels! So, as of now, your first task from your new teacher will be doing 200 pushups a day between chapters of Unequally!"

"Only 200? What a soft hearted simp!"

"... You know, if I didn't know of your reputation already, I'd so be going Urusai-Urusai-Urusai."

"You're a Kugimiya Rie voiced character. You literally cannot go through a single appearance without repeating that."

"Don't disrespect me just because I'm typecasted! Anyway, we also saw how another Servant was summoned! This week, it was Lancer's turn! Lancer's powers, other than incredible strenght, fighting skill, the greatest agility of all Servant types, metrosexuality through the roof and concentrated doomed badassness, include incredible doses of Carnival Phantasm-inspired bad luck that will make him die several times over before his final rest! So, in case you're ever going to take part in a Grail War, never try summoning a Lancer unless you know what you're getting into! Possible side effects of summoning a Lancer also including being screwed over and killed by creepy priests hellbent on the world's destruction!"

"I once met a guy who was a Lancer. They called him Vlad. He wanted to be a vampire so badly, he impaled people all the time and drank their blood. He begged me to make him a vampire, but I don't do wannabes, so I left him to his own devices."

"...!-!-!"

"Then again, after his death, everyone started saying he was an actual vampire, so in the end, I suppose he kind of got what he wished for..."

"You're trying to tell me you met Dracula?-!"

"Girla, that's just a stupid nickname he insisted having people call him. You look surprised by something so trivial? Let me tell you the true sad tale of Frankenstein's monster. It actually was this petite girl who fell in love with her creator..."

"What. The. Fuck."

"And Francis Drake? He actually was a woman in disguise."

"What."

"Gengis Khan and Blackbeard the Pirate were actually the same man, an immortal named Vandal Savage, who had the hots for me. He also claims being Alexander the Great, but don't believe him. The real Alexander was a much better man, and I know this from good sources. He commited a couple of the Jack the Ripper murders, but most of them were actually the work of another little girl. Although after that, a lowlife named Craddock took advantage of the murders to commit a string of ritual murders of his own. The creep was executed and became a wandering ghost. Between the three of them commited a whopping 39 murders, although they acted separatedly. The authorities only publically admitted eight of them, because—"

"I think we've run out of time..."

"Ah, well, we'll continue next time."

"Actually, I'm quitting. Fujimura can keep this job if she wants it, but I'm out..."
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IAmNotCreativeEnough
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Wait, I seem to recall a line about El Draque actually being okay with being summoned as a woman...

As a matter of fact, it seems that the genders are almost always opposite in Master/Servant pairs. Stupid Invincible God King complicating matters.

In any case, I think that chance provides hilarious dialogue choices, if I ever do write a Fate/EXTRA one shot dealing with this.

Which also provides hilarious hijinks if someone summons a female Nagi as a servant. "I have boobs? Sweet!"
rikalous wrote
 
Yes I am. I said I would, and I hate going back on my word. IANCE, you pustulating whoreson, I am going to find you when this is over. They will make a torture porn movie about your death, and they will have to tone it down to maintain suspension of disbelief.

Shadow Crystal Mage wrote
 
There there. Go do evil things in the name of the government to feel better.


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Shadow Crystal Mage
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OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!

So either Kayneth or Diarmuid was a woman... and Bluebeard's master was a woman... and Waver Velvet is really a girl... And True Assassin is really a woman...
I AM THE OVERLORD OF ALL CRACK!!!!!!
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rikalous
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Creature of the Deep

Diarmuid's supernaturally bishie, and Bluebeard's master mundanely so, so maybe that's close enough to count.
Let's Watch Nanoha
Wits, magic, and hardboiled monologues.
My other claims to fame.
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Where there's Fire

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"LOOK OUT!" Morisato Keiichi screamed, grabbing the nearest human body at hand and pulling it back with himself as the whole world seemed to burst in flames. It wasn't until he had dragged her quite a few steps back in a single yank that it sank in he had grabbed Makie-san, the gymnastics girl. Said girl was coughing and reaching into her hand basket, managing to whip out a large and intimidating handgun which made Keiichi yell even more. "WH-WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT THING?-!"

Makie's eyes squinted, and she tried to look through the columns of fire sprouting from the floor. "I can't get visuals! The bad guys escaped!"

"A damn good idea!" the normally sedate young man kept on trying to pull her along. "Everyone! Sora! Ayaka-san! Maid-san! Where are you?-!"

The roar of the flames and a piece of the ceiling collapsing down near his feet drowned his words. Keiichi cursed inwardly, hoping Konoeko-san and the creepy maid had been able to carry the others to safety in such a short notice. As for themselves, they'd be dead if they didn't move quick. "There's no time! Come along!"

"B-But the others—!"

"I'm sure they're okay! They were closer to the exit!" he tried to reassure more to himself than her. The girl was surprisingly difficult to move along, since she was very strong for her small size, and Keiichi was no Hercules at all. She tried to whip a ribbon with her free hand to look for her friends between the fire, but it was burnt as soon as she tossed it around, forcing her to drop it. After sobbing a little, she moved along with Keiichi the way they had come— as a matter of fact, now it was her pulling him along, rubbing her eyes and runny nose, and coughing. Once again, she showed her strenght, and Keiichi blinked in mild shock.

She ran so fast they had somehow made it back to relative safety before he knew how, although it was clear the fire would continue spreading, even if hopefully the elder's men would arrive shortly to control it. In the meanwhile, they only could flee back, hopefully to rejoin Negi-sensei and the others and warn them. He tried calling Sora through his cellphone as they moved on, but he got no signal, which worried him to no end. Still, he didn't say anything to avid worrying the already distraught Makie-san. He only wished there wouldn't be any more—

Out of nowhere, a small hideous devilish thing with bat-like wings broke in through a window, shrieking at them. Keiichi cried like a girl. Makie, while still bawling her eyes off, aimed the gun at its head and blew the top of it with a single accurate shot. Keiichi gulped as he creature literally disappeared from sight in mid-air.

Then four more of them crashed in from all opposite directions. Still crying, the young girl shot them all down without missing a beat.

There were horrible sounds coming from everywhere. They either had to find a really goo hiding place or a way out and a quick path to the city. But despite keeping some sort of automatic cold blood befitting a gunslinger, the girl under his care kept on crying for her friends, so he tried to comfort her as best as he could.

Pressing her against himself in a short brotherly hug, he rocked her back and forth twice. "Easy, easy, " he whispered. "That was great, and you saved both of us, but don't shoot again unless it's necessary, okay? And don't lose your head. If we survived, despite being the goofballs, the others must be right, right? Have faith on them, Makie-chan."

Sniffling her tears back, she looked up at him, a faint blush inking her cheeks. "O-Okay. Sorry 'bout that..."

He patted her head and tried to smile. "Don't be. Like I said, you just saved our lives. But let's keep on the move, alright?"

She nodded, bit her lower lip, and casually shot an ogreish looking thug creature trying to creep on him from behind, hitting him right between the eyes.

Keiichi, sweating lots of ice, tilted his eyes back at him just as his body hit the floor. "... Well, I owe you another one, don't I?"

"Th-Think nothing of it, Keiichi-san, " Makie said. "Which way now?"

"Over there. It's the only one leading away both from the fire and Evangeline-san, " he said, beginning to guide her down another passage. "I think so, at least. Keep your eyes well open, okay?"

"Y-Yes, sir!"

It was the first time a student had adressed him with true respect since the trip had started.

In a way, even between all that chaos, it felt nice.
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I'm subscribing to the theory that being bishie and/or girly qualifies.

And Waver Velvet was originally a woman. Summoning Alexander burned off his womanhood and made him a real man.
rikalous wrote
 
Yes I am. I said I would, and I hate going back on my word. IANCE, you pustulating whoreson, I am going to find you when this is over. They will make a torture porn movie about your death, and they will have to tone it down to maintain suspension of disbelief.

Shadow Crystal Mage wrote
 
There there. Go do evil things in the name of the government to feel better.


There Be Whales Here
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