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My heart is no longer in this; I'm sorry
Topic Started: Dec 17 2012, 10:11 AM (160 Views)
Dil
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13th Place/2nd Juror
Blue I am really struggling with playing in this. It hit me hardest today as I dropped my son off for school. I always take for granted that he will be there when I come to pick him up. Today I didn't want to pull away. I sat in my vehicle as he walked into the school and I was overcome with grief over families who are not going to get to pick their kids up today or any day. And I felt selfish. I thought of my son, of myself. I really need time to not worry about playing in this or any game. I am just not sure I know what the right thing to do is. But I don't think this is it.
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Regina Rocket
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I completely understand what you mean. I worked as a kindergarten teacher's assistant and Friday really hit me hard too. I had to avoid the media because it just was too much to deal with. The hardest - bravest - thing parents do is let go and give their children to the care of other people. It's a huge leap of faith that I never took lightly. I hope it helps to know that the staff is passionately commited 100% to every child. Really. Your son is in good hands.

We support you in whatever you decide.
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Dil
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13th Place/2nd Juror
Thank you for your note. I do feel the staff at schools do what they can and they make so little money...I know they do it because they care. The part that bothers me so much is that someone who has these kind of mental deficiencies really are not stoppable. They snap and no one knows it is coming. So many people have said they thought this kid was odd. Yet no one did anything did they? Ronald Reagan was president and he was shot. The Secret Service has said that if someone is willing to trade their life (average Americans mind you) they could get close to the president and there is only so much they can do. So I look at my kid and I think no one is protecting him in that manner. And then I look at these poor kids and think "what could have been?"

I need to get centered in life.
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Regina Rocket
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The Christmas break couldn't be coming at a better time. It'll put some distance between this event and the rest of the school year and it'll give families some time together to calm fears. Get through this week and you'll probably feel better.
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Reptar
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:cry Hey you! I meant to post in here sooner but I had to pick up my baby sister at the bus stop. You know after reading some of your posts at GTFO I had a feeling it would come to this and I want you to know that I fully support whatever decision you make. Truthfully this is a tough time for all of us with young kids and/or siblings so I get it and I hold nothing against you if you decide to bow out. I mean that. You have been incredible in this and I'm so glad to call you my friend now it's my turn to be a friend and support you with this :)

*hugs*
HALT IT'S REPTAR
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Dil
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13th Place/2nd Juror
I think you should remove me from the game. I thought about this very hard because it brought me much joy and I hate being a quitter. But it isn't fair to the rest of these people. As it is I am going to be letting a lot of people down. But the sooner you do this the better. It will give everyone more time to scramble.

I would ask that I could post one last message to the players if I could. I can have it done within 10 minutes of your approval if you give it.
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Reptar
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Okay sure! Post your goodbye in main and then I'll move you to jury. Sound good?
HALT IT'S REPTAR
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Dil
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13th Place/2nd Juror
Yes. I will go post now.
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Regina Rocket
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A message of support from Drew

Drew
 
Regina, tell Dil that I was deeply touched by what he said to me after I was voted out and I wish him the best of luck and happy holidays with his kid and wife 
Ad tell him he's awesome and the reason why he decided to leave the game was the best reason to leave an ORG there can be! Even though I had made bets with all my savings on him winning this thing. :<3

Btw... if he HAS to be a quitter than he is Jenna Morasca  :<3
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Dil
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13th Place/2nd Juror
I love Drew. And I am really happy with my choice. I really felt like I didn't have to be anywhere last night and that I was free to just be dad. We had a great night and when he went to bed I was able to check in on these guys after having a nice talk with my wife. No rushing off to a challenge and leaving them. I fee, good about how this worked out.
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