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| The Weekly Gazelle [Extra Season]; Updates on xs` affairs | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: May 20 2014, 10:43 AM (272 Views) | |
| SSMango | May 20 2014, 10:43 AM Post #1 |
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Editor of The Weekly Gazelle
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EXPLODING SHEEP! Today is the 5th anniversary of the creation of Exploding Sheep, and what better way to celebrate than to BRING BACK THE WEEKLY GAZELLE? Oh, you didn't think these updates were over, did you? Of course not! WELCOME TO THE WEEKLY GAZELLE: EXTRA SEASON. [5/12/14 7:56:54 PM] Cakes: xs existed in 8th grade [5/12/14 7:57:05 PM] Cakes: i believe it was made in april The Weekly Gazelle EXTRA SEASON Volume 1 Tuesday, May 20, 2014 Headlines
Hearthstone, the Pandemic Hearthstone is a The Hearthstone trend spread across our school a couple of months ago, shortly after the release of the game. Although at first dismissed by many as a dumb idea, the simplicity of the game captivated the hearts of many game fanatics in no time. The ease of playing and shortness of each match has made the game especially optimal for playing inside a school; as such, throughout the day our Skype rooms were filled with Hearthstone talk despite ongoing classes. As the school year approached its end, the situation got worse as students who finished their classes would simply play this game while sitting at a designated couch area all day. Though the gameplay is in fact simple, players at our school showed no hesitation in expressing their thoughts aloud as they duelled; Walking along the hallway, one would hear sporadic shouting and swearing from a group of people all staring at the screen. The luck factor in the game certainly helped spice these actions up as well, causing people to "pray to RNGesus" then immediately writhe in frustration or euphoria from watching the result of something analogous to a dice roll. During exam week, one girl remarked that her impression of Michlolz changed significantly after watching him constantly swear while playing this game, right before his AP Microeconomics examination. EDIT: crossed out wrong information Just Like the Good Ol' Days Yesterday, XS enjoyed some 10-man lobbies—the first lobbies of this kind in a long time. Members that joined the action were Bioniclemaster, Cakes, Fallen, Ibiza, Kero, Maggs, Mango, Michlolz, Pancakes, Yong (former Excess/Lion) and later Timo. Brah was initially in until he was called away by his parents; Tiffy could not join due to Internet issues. In short, whichever team had Cakes won. The first two games ended extremely early—Game 1 ended shortly after Cakes went 8/0/1 as Bloodseeker, while Game 2 ended as Radiant bot lane essentially barrelled down all the way to Dire barracks and permanently crippled the Dire team. Game 3, meanwhile, lasted significantly longer: Bioniclemaster Weaver and Michlolz Tinker on the Radiant team constantly dominated the lanes, forcing most of the Dire team to group up and gank the rest of the Radiant team who lost all farming space. Eventually Michlolz pushed enough creep lines into Kero on Phantom Lancer so that he could finally finish off the game. Fallen and Timo were new additions to the rosters this evening; Fallen surprised everybody with a Chen pick, and proceeded to win both of his games; Timo, although he lost, contributed much against the Dire team by wrecking ganks against his team with Ice Blast. Compendium of XS History This Year An anecdote. You already have two news articles to read, I can't write much more. On May 10, I went to Michlolz's house to study for the upcoming AP Biology and ghys exams. I did not get any studying done. However, I did become more knowledgeable about the Compendium, a virtual book in Dota 2 that one can purchase to support and cheer for the upcoming The International 4. It was perhaps about this time of the year when XS members started getting really into Dota 2. Dota keys had been distributed for a while from much before this time, but something triggered a sudden interest in our clan at this point. We stilled played Team Fortress 2 games, but Dota was now the norm between 6v6 sessions. Present—TF2 is long dead. We are practically addicted to Dota, even though it looks like we play mostly to complain about the game, either the heroes or the players, then proceed to brag about how well you played against said stupid heroes and players. The cause of this affinity for this game might lie in competitive gaming. Most XS members are avid followers of competitive Dota, commenting about streams whenever they're not playing a game themselves. Once upon a time, Michlolz was accused for watching streams all day and stealing bandwidth; nowadays, people are accused for NOT watching streams all day and learning about how to play proper Dota. With summer around the bend, the hot new craze is now The International 4, a massive Dota competition to be held in Seattle. We XS members are so enthusiastic that we initially planned to go to Seattle for a graduation trip just for the sake of watching competitive Dota at the site. Though this plan was dissolved when we discovered that the tickets for TI4 sold out immediately after going on sale, we still showed our support for Dota through purchasing Compendiums. This is perfectly fine. If I liked e-sports myself, I would've bought one for sure. Sitting in Michlolz's house while trying to cram for AP Biology, Michlolz at his desk with two MacBook Pros (one for Skype, one for games) suddenly remembers that he has to purchase a Compendium. He orders several copies, one for himself and the rest as requests by friends. That's already a sizeable purchase for a high schooler, but it's totally fine since he's being paid to buy for his friends. However, Michlolz soon discovers that one can also buy extra points to boost one's Compendium level. (Each level requires 100 points. Typical in-game objectives grant 25 to 100 points. The last level in which one gets a specific reward is level 55.) Suddenly, within seconds, Michlolz is level 97. Later that day, I watched as Michlolz et al. were destroyed in a Dota game. I felt less sad about abstaining from Dota then. XS Dictionary Definition of the Week It's been a while, so here are SEVERAL entries! aids – noun Originally referred to a condition in which one is cringing. Recently used simply as a sign of disapproval. Said mainly by Tiffy. [5/10/14 11:14:08 PM] Tiffy: i am prepared to get aids [word, all letters spaced apart and in capital letters] B O Y S – exclamation Derivative from lyrics in [5/8/14 10:16:03 PM] Cakes: wat how could people not know sacramento [5/8/14 10:16:07 PM] Cakes: it's the capital of california [5/8/14 10:16:11 PM] Cakes: *american people [5/8/14 10:16:30 PM] Pancakes: implying people at our school know anything about geography [5/8/14 10:16:47 PM] Mango: implying people don't only recognize california for francisco angeles and diego [5/8/14 10:16:58 PM] Tiffy: no more beaner names please [5/8/14 10:17:01 PM] Tiffy: i know what your'e trying to do mango [5/8/14 10:17:08 PM] Tiffy: you're trying to beanify this chat by sneaking it mexican names [5/8/14 10:17:11 PM] Tiffy: but i know what you're doing [5/8/14 10:17:16 PM] Tiffy: stop sexing u sex [5/8/14 10:17:22 PM] Tiffy: >francisco [5/8/14 10:17:24 PM] Tiffy: >diego [5/8/14 10:17:32 PM] Tiffy: my penis literally shrivelled into taco [5/8/14 10:17:48 PM] Tiffy: A I D S B O Y S no more, no more [expression] – expression Used to complain about an overused expression. Chiefly only used by me. [5/15/14 7:02:13 AM] issa: (e) [5/15/14 7:02:14 AM] issa: (e) [5/15/14 7:02:15 AM] issa: (e) [5/15/14 7:03:19 AM] Pancakes: br0 [5/15/14 7:03:27 AM] Pancakes: ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss [5/15/14 7:04:13 AM] Mango: no more [5/15/14 7:04:15 AM] Mango: no more mail [5/15/14 7:06:43 AM] Brah: no more MALE more like i… i [phrase] – expression Used to communicate hesitation in making a response. Can be also used without the second clause, as in just "i…"; this variant is used to indicate speechlessness, typically out of exasperation. [5/8/14 7:00:17 PM] Cakes: hay guise im at 3950 mmr for both solo and party [5/8/14 7:00:25 PM] Cakes: #trench [5/8/14 7:00:31 PM] Mango: that's like my party mmr [5/8/14 7:00:35 PM] Mango: plus 1000 [5/8/14 7:00:39 PM] Cakes: i... [5/8/14 7:01:01 PM] Tiffy: i.......................... [5/8/14 7:01:02 PM] Tiffy: robot [object] appreciation chat – topic Template for XS Skype chat topic. The object of appreciation is actually rarely appreciated by the entire group. oreo – expression The ultimate evolutionary form of "amirite". Unfortunately started by yours truly, Mango. Evolution path: am I right → amirite → omorote → omroteo → oreo [5/20/14 8:29:00 PM] Cakes: who's the caster [5/20/14 8:29:03 PM] Cakes: ARTEEZY?!?! [5/20/14 8:29:05 PM] Cakes: oreo [5/20/14 8:32:37 PM] Mango: no more [5/20/14 8:32:39 PM] Mango: no more oreo [5/20/14 8:33:02 PM] Michlolz: there should be a triple dmg rune [5/20/14 8:33:06 PM] Cakes: no. [5/20/14 8:33:10 PM] Cakes: sex you mango [5/20/14 8:33:16 PM] Cakes: Cakes set topic to "OREO® appreciation chat" EDIT: crossed out wrong information, added new text in red font Notes Titles might change, sections might change, but the Notes section is still here! This is my most favorite section, because I can write anything I want in here without context. I woke up at 5 PM today. Last season, I was planning to write until the end…and then my internet access sudden got limited, which meant I couldn't game anymore. Then I pretty much got ceebs about it. But don't worry! I'm back on full internet, and I'm ready to bring news again! This time it'll probably continue for about a month, when we start leaving for college and stuff like that. Happy birthday XS! Wonder if this is going to be the last anniversary? Edited by SSMango, May 21 2014, 02:41 AM.
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| The Weekly Gazelle Season IV - first issue ejaculating Sunday, August 18 | |
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| SSMango | Jul 2 2014, 01:25 AM Post #2 |
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Editor of The Weekly Gazelle
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The Weekly Gazelle EXTRA SEASON Volume 2 Tuesday, July 1, 2014 Headlines
XS Dota Digest - June June was characterized by record-breaking amounts of time invested into Dota 2, facilitated largely by the XS seniors' graduation from high school. Multitudes of games happen every day and every night, sometimes all the way up to 1 AM, the realm of the dreaded #midnightdoto. Naturally, an increase in Dota-time leads to an increase in trashtalk-time. [5/31/2014 4:17:14 PM] Cakes: ONCE [5/31/2014 4:17:15 PM] Cakes: AGAIN [5/31/2014 4:17:16 PM] Cakes: I LOST [5/31/2014 4:17:18 PM] Cakes: DUE TO RETARDED PLAYERS [5/31/2014 4:17:18 PM] Cakes: PLEASE [5/31/2014 4:17:19 PM] Cakes: THIS ISN'T 4K [5/31/2014 4:17:20 PM] Cakes: SPARE ME [5/31/2014 4:19:23 PM] Michlolz: LOL [5/31/2014 4:19:24 PM] Michlolz: G_G [5/31/2014 4:20:26 PM] Cakes: EVERY [5/31/2014 4:20:28 PM] Cakes: sexING GAME [5/31/2014 4:20:29 PM] Cakes: EVERY DAY [5/31/2014 4:20:31 PM] Cakes: 4 CARRIES [5/31/2014 4:20:37 PM] Cakes: AND THEN THEY FEED [5/31/2014 4:20:38 PM] Cakes: AT LEAST [5/31/2014 4:20:40 PM] Cakes: DON'T DIE IN LANE [5/31/2014 4:20:40 PM] Cakes: PLZ [5/31/2014 4:20:50 PM] Cakes: sex ME In our XS group chat, capital letters can mean several things: bad joke, genuine exclamation, karaoke, or something dumb in general. Otherwise, it usually means rage. The amount of capital letters seen in the XS chat is reaching phenomenal levels, partly thanks to Cakes, whom gives us detailed commentary on the current situation of 4000 MMR every other day. [6/3/2014 11:17:06 AM] Cakes: WAIT WHAT [6/3/2014 11:17:07 AM] Cakes: WHAT HAPPENED [6/3/2014 11:17:11 AM] Cakes: WHAT'S THIS ABOUT COLD SNAP NERFED [6/3/2014 11:17:39 AM] Mango: brah here [6/3/2014 11:17:52 AM] Cakes: YESSSSSSSSSSS [6/3/2014 11:17:54 AM] Cakes: sex ALL OF YOU [6/3/2014 11:17:55 AM] Mango: yep cold snap nerfed in damage [6/3/2014 11:17:58 AM] Cakes: I sexING KNEW IT WAS GONNA GET NERFED [6/3/2014 11:18:00 AM] Cakes: sex YOU REDDIT [6/3/2014 11:18:07 AM] Cakes: PIECE OF SHIT Of course, the Dota experience isn't all bad. With the release of Patch 6.81b, a lot of complaints about the game balance have subsided. Cold Snap is rarely mentioned nowadays, and Sacred Arrow is only mentioned if somebody was caught off-guard and failed to dodge one (typically by a Mirana parked at high ground near mid-lane). Instead, most of the rage revolves around the "bad" players that we get paired up with. [6/18/2014 9:53:30 AM] Pancakes: dont know if bloodseeker or this mmr [6/18/2014 9:53:39 AM] Pancakes: but i just went 14-4 using a trackpad [6/18/2014 11:59:12 AM] Kane: i.... [6/18/2014 11:59:14 AM] Kane: i just got aids [6/18/2014 11:59:28 AM] Kane: i think i feel a neckbeard starting to grow as well Not all matches with bad players lead to rage, though; Pancakes, finally freed from Perfect World and Shanghai internet, is currently experiencing the green zone of his life, thanks to the 'different' players on the NA servers. He's recently regained positive winrate status, and even found himself a 13-game winstreak shortly after crossing the ocean. [6/2/2014 2:15:53 PM] Cakes: CAN YOU LET ME OUT [6/2/2014 2:15:56 PM] Cakes: CAN YOU LET ME OUT [6/2/2014 2:15:59 PM] Cakes: CAN YOU SET ME FREE FROM 4k mmr Unfortunately for us on the other side of the International Date Line, Pancakes' anecdotes only serve to remind us how miserable our experiences really are. Cakes, in particular, can be frequently seen expressing his disappointment with his matches in solo queue, even with the highest MMR in XS. A theory is that the advent of summer brought in new players and diluted the MMR system, though nobody can tell for sure. [6/1/2014 7:30:38 PM] Cakes: ARE YOU [6/1/2014 7:30:38 PM] Cakes: sexING [6/1/2014 7:30:39 PM] Cakes: SHITTING ME [6/1/2014 7:30:41 PM] Cakes: ANOTHER sexING GAME [6/1/2014 7:30:42 PM] Cakes: LIKE THIS [6/1/2014 7:30:45 PM] Cakes: EVERY SINGLE sexING GAME [6/1/2014 7:30:47 PM] Cakes: IM THE ONLY SUPPORT [6/1/2014 7:30:47 PM] Cakes: I SAY [6/1/2014 7:30:48 PM] Cakes: sexING PICK A SUPPROT [6/1/2014 7:30:52 PM] Cakes: LAST GUY PICKS DOOM [6/1/2014 7:31:01 PM] Cakes: EVERYONE FEEDS [6/1/2014 7:31:11 PM] Cakes: EVEN THOUGH I HAVE WARDS AND COURIER [6/1/2014 7:32:08 PM] Cakes: SOMEONE BUYS A MIDAS AT 11-14 MINUTES [6/1/2014 7:32:10 PM] Cakes: WHAT THE sexING SHIT One of the discussions that has been ongoing for a while (since before June) about the support role. Apparently, the concept of supporting doesn't really exist in Chinese pubs. The mid-laner must buy the courier, and wards are purchased by whoever that needs them. Early game is generally characterized by passive last hitting and denying, often so passive that the laners don't realize when the enemies have been missing for half a minute. Even Excess has been rather vocal about this aspect of local Dota, adding #chinadoto to the pool of hashtags. [6/18/2014 8:28:54 PM] Michlolz: WELP [6/18/2014 8:28:56 PM] Michlolz: I JUST SOLD MY MANTA [6/18/2014 8:29:00 PM] Michlolz: INSTEAD OF MY STOUT SHIELD The conflicts aren't all concerned with others, however; some discussions in #postgametalk sometimes points toward internal issues. These mostly happen with 5-stack queues, where there aren't any random teammates to blame but the people you queued with. Often, the discussion comes around to pointing out a lack of supporting and ganking, pinning the blame of Tiffy for playing Terrorblade in the jungle, or just bullying Maggs. [6/1/2014 2:26:02 PM] Cakes: i remember [6/1/2014 2:26:06 PM] Cakes: on the elevator [6/1/2014 2:26:07 PM] Cakes: michlolz was telling the girls [6/1/2014 2:26:10 PM] Cakes: about how i was the best midlaner [6/1/2014 2:26:11 PM] Cakes: MFW [6/1/2014 2:26:17 PM] Cakes: thx michlolz [6/1/2014 2:26:20 PM] Cakes: ur the best when ur drunk [6/1/2014 2:26:25 PM] Michlolz: LOL [6/1/2014 2:26:28 PM] Michlolz: I SAID THAT?? [6/1/2014 2:26:30 PM] Cakes: yes Nevertheless, despite feeds, arrows, lags, and countless other issues, at the end of the day we enjoy (or at least act like we enjoy) Dota 2. [6/24/2014 2:02:52 AM] Cakes: sex dota S O B E R B O Y S Believe it or not, XS has also been social for events unrelated to Dota! The largest happening in June was perhaps the senior graduation trip. We originally intended to visit Seattle to watch TI4; that plan was dissolved immediately after the tickets sold out immediately after release. Instead, we decided to tour Tokyo as a group of nine male gamers. The group consisted of Brah, Cakes, Excess, Hyuna, issa, Maggs, Michlolz, Tiffy, and Mango (that's me). Pancakes couldn't make it, unfortunately, since he had to return to America. The trip turned out more or less a success, without serious accidents taking place (then again, it's very difficult to run into an accident in Japan). During the daytime, we walked around some big tourist spots, visiting Akihabara, Shinjuku, Odaiba and the Skytree. Our hotel was located in Ryogoku, also known as Sumo Land. [6/11/2014 12:05:45 AM] Michlolz: BRAH [6/11/2014 12:05:48 AM] Michlolz: I GOT THE DEFIB KILL [6/11/2014 12:14:46 AM] Brah: NICE [6/11/2014 12:14:50 AM] Brah: i heard "YEAAAAAH" [6/11/2014 12:14:51 AM] Brah: from your room [6/11/2014 12:14:54 AM] Brah: so grats Allow me to mention that nighttime at the hotel was a nightmare. In my room with Tiffy, Tiffy REPEATEDLY played two unforgivably bad songs from Arteezy's TERRIBLE stream playlist: Get Higher by Juicy J and a recorder 'performance' of Your Heart Will Go On by Matt Mulholland. Both songs were played on repeat for HOURS at a time (sometimes SIMULTANEOUSLY); the experience was so traumatic that I came to seek refuge in Maggs and Michlolz's rooms toward the end of the trip. I also have to mention that these songs were occasionally spiced up by screams from across the walls, typically caused by Michlolz from two rooms down the hall. Now that I think of it, perhaps the recorder and rap were looped in retaliation after I made them walk leagues through the hot and humid streets of Tokyo every day. lol. [6/17/2014 2:18:44 AM] Cakes: mfw issa kicked a huge flower pot [6/17/2014 2:18:46 AM] Cakes: tripped in it [6/17/2014 2:18:50 AM] Cakes: then got a bruise by his eye [6/17/2014 2:18:53 AM] Cakes: and messed up his glasses [6/17/2014 2:18:59 AM] Cakes: also he has a flight tomorrow and he has to get up at 7 [6/17/2014 9:35:59 AM] Michlolz: LOL [6/17/2014 9:36:07 AM] Michlolz: my mom got an email from issa's mom [6/17/2014 9:36:15 AM] Michlolz: saying to pray that his eye heals Back in Shanghai, a large deal of socializing has been going on at a particular bar. Though I haven't been to the scene myself (I don't want to risk getting drunk), we frequently hear stories about ridiculous happenings, including stories about knife fights and tripping over flower pots. [5/31/2014 5:29:23 PM] Cakes: B E A N E R B O Y S 2014 [5/31/2014 5:30:14 PM] Cakes: get BEANED [5/31/2014 5:30:16 PM] Cakes: BEANS [5/31/2014 5:30:17 PM] Cakes: BEANS Another large deal of socializing happens at a local Mexican restaurant, which we started to call "Beaners" from Tiffy's influence. Traditionally, group dinners happen here, where I order a large plate of nachos and Michlolz eats the majority of it. [6/4/2014 8:21:40 PM] Tiffy: MANGO WHERE THE sex IS THE GAZELLE [6/4/2014 8:21:43 PM] Tiffy: I NEED TO READ ABOUT MYSELF Tiffy isn't exactly the star of the group, but he has been particularly active away from the screen. Playing pool as a group, Tiffy somehow managed to win a 1v7 game with his injured elbow, reminding us of his ridiculous luck from his days of playing Ogre Magi and Axe (before change to pseudo-random). He has also been the leader of the cycling trend recently, abruptly showing up in front of people's compounds and asking them if they want to bike along to lunch (he actually only watches you eat, since he's on a diet right now). 10 years since xs scrim. [6/4/2014 8:20:02 PM] Tiffy: w [6/4/2014 8:20:02 PM] Tiffy: a [6/4/2014 8:20:02 PM] Tiffy: t [6/4/2014 8:20:04 PM] Kane: G [6/4/2014 8:20:04 PM] Kane: A [6/4/2014 8:20:04 PM] Kane: Y [6/4/2014 8:20:05 PM] Kane: B [6/4/2014 8:20:06 PM] Kane: O [6/4/2014 8:20:07 PM] Kane: Y [6/4/2014 8:20:07 PM] Kane: S [6/4/2014 8:20:07 PM] Tiffy: that is my kane impression [6/4/2014 8:20:15 PM] Tiffy: m'lady [6/4/2014 8:20:19 PM] Tiffy: *tips dick* No XS digest would be complete without highlighting the XS group chat! [6/1/2014 10:58:34 PM] Brah: charisma [6/1/2014 10:58:38 PM] Brah: that's a good charisma As a general trend, the quality and sophistication of the conversation is ever-decreasing; we are practically permanently stuck in #sundaynightchat. A major reason is likely the fact that there's nothing school-related to discuss anymore, meaning even less serious stuff to talk about. In exchange, though, some new topics and hobbies have started to show up: [6/5/2014 1:12:39 AM] Hyuna: is attack on titans a good anime [6/5/2014 1:12:49 AM] Mango: ya [6/5/2014 1:12:49 AM] Brah: yeah if you like giant naked men [6/5/2014 1:12:54 AM] Mango: —supposedly [6/5/2014 1:12:57 AM] Brah: giant [6/5/2014 1:12:57 AM] Brah: naked [6/5/2014 1:12:58 AM] Brah: men [6/5/2014 1:13:01 AM] Tiffy: giant penises [6/5/2014 1:13:11 AM] Brah: if you like giant penises flopping around destroying buildings [6/5/2014 1:13:14 AM] Brah: you'll love attack on titan Although the subject surfaced now and then previously, anime has certainly transformed into a large topic within XS. Part of this might be inspired by our senior trip to Japan, including experiences from adult shops and maid cafes in Akihabara. (I didn't enter either stores, so I can't comment much about that, unfortunately.) [6/20/2014 11:39:16 PM] Cakes: mango wat do u think about tsunderes [6/20/2014 11:39:32 PM] Mango: overused [6/20/2014 11:39:34 PM] Kane: u r a baka [6/20/2014 11:40:03 PM] Cakes: do u know ne tsnderes in real life mango?// [6/20/2014 11:40:23 PM] Mango: tiffy [6/20/2014 11:41:03 PM] Cakes: YES. [6/20/2014 11:41:13 PM] Sharp: tiffy actually could be an amazing tsundere [6/20/2014 11:42:41 PM] Cakes: implying he isn't already one [6/20/2014 11:43:21 PM] Tiffy: wha- [6/20/2014 11:43:28 PM] Tiffy: i'm going to lynch you mothersexer [6/20/2014 11:43:48 PM] Cakes: plz [6/20/2014 11:43:49 PM] Tiffy: lynch you like a cotton picking negro [6/20/2014 11:43:57 PM] Cakes: tiffy stpop tsundere plz The influences from the trip to Tokyo doesn't stop at anime, either. Very often, people will start asking me questions about Japan after being reminded of some Japanese stereotype. Tiffy has gone as far as asking for miso soup when he came to my house. [6/20/2014 2:16:43 AM] Cakes: wat if [6/20/2014 2:16:55 AM] Cakes: at the end of SAO they all return to their normal lives and it's revealed that asuna is actually a fat neckbeard [6/20/2014 2:17:43 AM] Mango: no. [6/20/2014 2:17:59 AM] Cakes: pretty gud ending huh??? [6/20/2014 2:18:01 AM] Cakes: i thought of it myself [6/20/2014 2:18:04 AM] Cakes: i should become an anime writer [6/20/2014 2:18:33 AM] Pancakes: no. [6/20/2014 2:18:48 AM] Cakes: i should write for one piece [6/20/2014 2:18:56 AM] Cakes: at the end they find the one piece [6/20/2014 2:18:58 AM] Cakes: and that's the end [6/20/2014 2:19:05 AM] Cakes: it just ends with them holding a treasure box [6/20/2014 2:19:06 AM] Cakes: (y) [6/20/2014 2:19:16 AM] Mango: that's [6/20/2014 2:19:20 AM] Mango: the dumbest thing I've ever heard [6/20/2014 2:19:31 AM] Mango: 30 years of manga [6/20/2014 2:19:38 AM] Cakes: what [6/20/2014 2:19:42 AM] Cakes: it's what they're trying to do [6/20/2014 2:19:46 AM] Cakes: so in the end they do it [6/20/2014 2:19:50 AM] Cakes: that's like [6/20/2014 2:19:52 AM] Cakes: the perfect ending [6/20/2014 2:20:04 AM] Mango: 30 years culminating in a group photo around a treasure box [6/20/2014 2:20:05 AM] Mango: nthx [6/20/2014 2:20:11 AM] Cakes: no there's no group photo [6/20/2014 2:20:17 AM] Cakes: pirates don't have CAMERAS u DUMASs [6/20/2014 2:20:22 AM] Mango: actually. [6/20/2014 2:20:32 AM] Cakes: how about [6/20/2014 2:20:35 AM | Edited 2:20:37 AM] Cakes: at the end it's revealed [6/20/2014 2:20:42 AM] Cakes: that gomu gomu fruit gives u cancer [6/20/2014 2:20:48 AM] Cakes: and all that time luffy spent fighting and surviving is wasted [6/20/2014 2:20:50 AM] Cakes: and he dies [6/20/2014 2:20:55 AM] Cakes: before they reach the one piece [6/20/2014 2:20:57 AM] Cakes: (Y) [6/20/2014 2:21:08 AM] Mango: how about an ending that you'd be satisfied with yourself [6/20/2014 2:21:15 AM] Cakes: are you inspired to write the gazelle yet mango Of course, it's still #sundaynightchat. The quality of talk is still abysmally low, or as Tiffy would put it, 'aids-inducing'. [6/18/2014 8:54:12 PM] Tiffy: kane's status gave me aids [6/18/2014 8:54:26 PM] Michlolz: its just his stream link wat [6/18/2014 8:54:34 PM] Kane: i'm not streaming right now [6/18/2014 8:54:38 PM] Tiffy: michlolz's dp gave me aids too [6/18/2014 8:54:47 PM] Michlolz: good [6/18/2014 8:54:51 PM] Kane: we should make an aids counter [6/18/2014 8:54:58 PM] Kane: every time tiffy says something gave him aids [6/18/2014 8:55:01 PM] Kane: we add it to the list [6/18/2014 8:55:06 PM] Tiffy: that idea [6/18/2014 8:55:07 PM] Michlolz: no [6/18/2014 8:55:07 PM] Michlolz: that list [6/18/2014 8:55:08 PM] Tiffy: just gave me aids [6/18/2014 8:55:10 PM] Michlolz: wil lbe [6/18/2014 8:55:11 PM] Michlolz: way too long [6/18/2014 8:55:15 PM] Sharp: tiffy i think youve contracted more aids than the africans combined [6/18/2014 8:55:22 PM] Tiffy: HAH! [6/18/2014 8:55:24 PM] Tiffy: implying i can outnegro negroes [6/18/2014 8:55:59 PM] Kane: but can u outnegro beaners??? [6/18/2014 8:56:21 PM] Tiffy: no [6/18/2014 8:56:26 PM] Tiffy: burritoes are too bean for me nowadays Then again, there's probably nothing that isn't 'aids-inducing' to Tiffy. Even Tiffy himself. [6/19/2014 12:02:54 AM] Tiffy: do u wan cream [6/19/2014 12:02:58 AM] Tiffy: sweet [6/19/2014 12:02:58 AM] Cakes: i do enjoy craem! [6/19/2014 12:03:01 AM] Tiffy: i knew u enjoy creem [6/19/2014 12:03:05 AM] Sharp: got spaec [6/19/2014 12:03:08 AM] Tiffy: no [6/19/2014 12:03:09 AM] Tiffy: 3 man [6/19/2014 12:03:10 AM] Sharp: got milk [6/19/2014 12:03:10 AM] Mango: PLEASE [6/19/2014 12:03:11 AM] Mango: SPELL [6/19/2014 12:03:16 AM] Sharp: malk [6/19/2014 12:03:17 AM] Tiffy: w4t [6/19/2014 12:03:17 AM] Cakes: fuekc ue mango [6/19/2014 12:03:25 AM] Tiffy: how du cu spell? [6/19/2014 12:03:29 AM] Tiffy: mango cum At this point, I'm just throwing out quotes without even a sliver of analysis, but part of that is because a sizable portion of the XS group chat is unintelligible. The spelling, in particular, is appalling. I'd even say it's a talent if you're able to screw up words this far, but I'll take it back because I'm scared that the chat will turn into something even worse than its current state. [6/7/2014 5:58:11 AM] Pancakes: does sniper ult cancel tps? [6/7/2014 5:58:23 AM] Maggs: no theres no stun [6/7/2014 5:59:06 AM] Michlolz: yes it does [6/7/2014 5:59:08 AM] Michlolz: sexing maggs [6/7/2014 5:59:13 AM] Michlolz: it ministuns when it hits u [6/7/2014 5:59:17 AM] Maggs: til [6/7/2014 5:59:27 AM] Cakes: noob maggs [6/7/2014 5:59:32 AM] Michlolz: u sexing play that faggot hero and u dont know [6/7/2014 5:59:39 AM] Maggs: i never need to interupt a tp [6/7/2014 5:59:41 AM] Maggs: cuz headshot [6/7/2014 5:59:43 AM] Maggs: (cool) [6/7/2014 5:59:45 AM] Michlolz: stop being a shitty [6/7/2014 5:59:45 AM] Cakes: think it goes through bkb even [6/7/2014 5:59:59 AM] Maggs: the dmg is magical isnt it [6/7/2014 6:00:07 AM] Michlolz: no its pure.. [6/7/2014 6:00:11 AM] Maggs: WHAT [6/7/2014 6:00:12 AM] Maggs: ITS PURE DMG? [6/7/2014 6:00:17 AM] Michlolz: holy shit [6/7/2014 6:00:26 AM] Michlolz: maggs is the most sexing retarded person ever [6/7/2014 6:00:34 AM] Michlolz: its magical dipshit Note that spelling isn't the only problem; here's a typical example of #sundaynightchat without any particular issues in spelling. (In fact, conventional chat language is as sophisticated as the Queen's English in XS.) [6/19/2014 11:25:20 PM] Cakes: THERE ARE ONE HUNDRED WAYS TO LOVE A CAT [6/19/2014 11:25:24 PM] Cakes: ONE HUNDRED LOVING WAAAAAYS [6/19/2014 11:25:25 PM] Cakes: WAY ONE! [6/19/2014 11:25:31 PM] Mango: can we just [6/19/2014 11:25:31 PM] Cakes: KEEP A TIDY HOUSE FOR THEM [6/19/2014 11:25:31 PM] Tiffy: wha- [6/19/2014 11:25:33 PM] Cakes: ONE HUNDRED LOVING WAYS [6/19/2014 11:25:36 PM] Mango: make a designated karaoke chat [6/19/2014 11:25:39 PM] Cakes: THERE ARE ONE HUNDRED WAYS TO LOVE A CAT, ONE HUNDRED LOVING WAAAAYS [6/19/2014 11:25:41 PM] Cakes: WAY TWO! [6/19/2014 11:25:45 PM] Cakes: BE SURE TO CLIP THEIR CLAAAWS [6/19/2014 11:25:45 PM] Tiffy: TAKE A BLUNT DIP IT IN THE LEAN THEN LIGHT IT [6/19/2014 11:25:47 PM] Cakes: ONE HUNDRED LOVING WAYS [6/19/2014 11:25:50 PM] Tiffy: POP A MOLLY DRINK SOME ORANGE JUICE GET HIGHER Last but not least, one can't exclude the spontaneous karaoke sessions that occur inside the chat. Notably, Tiffy has joined this tradition recently since he became fascinated Juicy J, to my dismay. Unfortunately, an overwhelming majority of XS seems to support Arteezy and his migraine-inducing playlist. Consequently, nobody held back Tiffy has been allowed to rap non-stop in whatever inactive chat he finds, ranging from the conversation below Skype calls to the chat window in Captain's Mode. [6/25/2014 6:20:06 PM] Mango: hm [6/25/2014 6:20:09 PM] Mango: I only got hooked once [6/25/2014 6:20:12 PM] Mango: and it was point blank [6/25/2014 6:21:40 PM] Cakes: hooker [6/25/2014 6:21:43 PM] Cakes: that's a good profession to pursue [6/25/2014 6:22:00 PM] Cakes: amioreo? [6/25/2014 6:22:03 PM] Sharp: no. [6/25/2014 6:22:24 PM] Sharp: rey im goin show wht u said to ur syster!!!!! [6/25/2014 6:22:41 PM] Cakes: i'll allow it if u can score 2400! [6/25/2014 6:22:48 PM] Cakes: amioreo? [6/25/2014 6:23:51 PM] Mango: ok I did think that oreo would stay for a week or two [6/25/2014 6:24:07 PM] Mango: but this I didn't foresee [6/25/2014 6:24:24 PM] Cakes: amioreo? [6/25/2014 6:24:31 PM] Sharp: inb4 oreo side-evolves into onee [6/25/2014 6:25:17 PM] Mango: no [6/25/2014 6:25:18 PM] Mango: pls [6/25/2014 6:25:28 PM] Mango: AT LEAST keep one consonant the same as "am I right" [6/25/2014 6:25:57 PM] Cakes: amioreo? [6/25/2014 6:25:58 PM] Cakes: amioreo? [6/25/2014 6:29:12 PM] Mango: I bet not even nabisco headquarters doesn't use 'oreo' this often XS Dictionary Definitions of the beaners - noun Mexican food. In particular, refers to that of Pistolera, a local restaurant here in Shanghai. [6/21/2014 8:16:18 PM] Tiffy: i might come to [6/21/2014 8:16:20 PM] Tiffy: whatever the diner is [6/21/2014 8:16:23 PM] Tiffy: the one that brah's leaving [6/21/2014 8:16:33 PM] Tiffy: because #brahappreciationday [6/21/2014 8:16:39 PM] Tiffy: but if it's beaners [6/21/2014 8:16:41 PM] Tiffy: i'm going to shoot someone [6/21/2014 8:16:45 PM] Michlolz: beaners it is [6/21/2014 8:18:16 PM] Cakes: > not eating beaners [6/21/2014 8:18:25 PM] Michlolz: wait legit [6/21/2014 8:18:28 PM] Michlolz: i actually dont want beaners [6/21/2014 8:18:30 PM] Michlolz: LOL Brah removed _____ from this conversation. - message Automated message displayed when Brah throws the banhammer down on somebody in the chat. Typically caused by Tiffy. [6/20/2014 11:57:58 PM] Tiffy: ALL A NIGGA DO IS SIP LEAN AND sex HOES [6/20/2014 11:58:12 PM] Mango: no more [6/20/2014 11:58:17 PM] Cakes: no more lean [6/20/2014 11:58:27 PM] Tiffy: brother, do you not appreciate juicy j? [6/20/2014 11:58:42 PM] Tiffy: moist cock [6/20/2014 11:58:45 PM | Edited 11:58:47 PM] Tiffy: that's a bad thing to have [6/20/2014 11:59:00 PM] Tiffy: you'll grow mold on it if you don't dry it off real soon [6/20/2014 11:59:14 PM] Tiffy: it's like the nether region version of athlete's foot [6/20/2014 11:59:19 PM] Tiffy: except it's called athlete's cock [6/21/2014 12:00:07 AM] Tiffy: quick mango [6/21/2014 12:00:09 AM] Tiffy: what do you think [6/21/2014 12:00:11 AM] Tiffy: of the city [6/21/2014 12:00:14 AM] Tiffy: of kyoto [6/21/2014 12:00:24 AM] Cakes: every night is sunday night chat [6/21/2014 12:00:32 AM] Tiffy: Sa d byes [6/21/2014 12:00:35 AM] Tiffy: orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr30 [6/21/2014 12:00:41 AM] Tiffy: 8===> [6/21/2014 12:00:54 AM] Tiffy: sunda yn inght chat pariecation thread [6/21/2014 12:00:59 AM] Tiffy: what he sex mango [6/21/2014 12:01:00 AM] Tiffy: [pa[pw [6/21/2014 12:01:03 AM] Tiffy: wwrite the gazelle pls [6/21/2014 12:01:08 AM] Tiffy: before my body is dry [6/21/2014 12:01:13 AM] Tiffy: cuzit isnt dry rite now [6/21/2014 12:01:17 AM] Tiffy: orrrrreo [6/21/2014 12:01:19 AM] Tiffy: orororororor [6/21/2014 12:01:20 AM] Tiffy: r [6/21/2014 12:01:22 AM] Tiffy: orroro [6/21/2014 12:01:29 AM] Cakes: no more [6/21/2014 12:01:30 AM] *** Brah removed Tiffy from this conversation. *** heuueoYOY! - exclamation A new evolution to "hue", one of the big three mutating words in the XS Dictionary. (The two other big words are "amirite" and "pls" .) Evolutionary path: hue > ahooey > aheuyO! > heuueoYOY! [6/27/2014 11:07:46 PM] Cakes: i'm up for dota in a bit [6/27/2014 11:07:50 PM] Cakes: and by bit i mean like 20-30 minutes [6/27/2014 11:07:51 PM] Cakes: heuueoYOY! [6/27/2014 11:07:53 PM] Tiffy: i'm up for dota in a bit [6/27/2014 11:07:57 PM] Tiffy: and by bit i mean like 20-30 minutes [6/27/2014 11:08:01 PM] Tiffy: heuheuhueueuehuehuehepenis [6/27/2014 11:08:05 PM] Mango: [Friday, June 27, 2014 11:07 PM] Cakes: <<< heuueoYOY! [6/27/2014 11:08:07 PM] Mango: i... [6/27/2014 11:08:19 PM] Cakes: heuueoYOY! [6/27/2014 11:08:23 PM] Mango: NO. [6/27/2014 11:08:23 PM] Mango: NO [6/27/2014 11:08:36 PM] Brah: heuueoYOY! [6/27/2014 11:08:37 PM] Brah: heuueoYOY! [6/27/2014 11:08:40 PM] *** Cakes has changed the conversation topic to "heuueoYOY!" *** midnight dota - noun A very good excuse to dodge a Dota 2 party invite past 12 AM. [6/25/2014 11:57:49 PM] Tiffy: if we got maggs and mango we could 5 man [6/25/2014 11:59:06 PM] Mango: dud it's midnight [6/25/2014 11:59:12 PM] Tiffy: shut the sex up whore!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [6/25/2014 11:59:12 PM] Cakes: ^ [6/25/2014 11:59:14 PM] Cakes: no more midnight doto plz [6/25/2014 11:59:15 PM] Tiffy: no more duds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [6/25/2014 11:59:21 PM] Mango: midnight dota worst dota [6/25/2014 11:59:24 PM] Cakes: ok u guys 3 queue [6/25/2014 11:59:25 PM] Tiffy: im gonna shovel shit up ur milk dud mango sand in your peehole (y) - phrase The result of trying to find a phrase that goes well with (y), which is the thumbs up emote on Skype. [5/29/2014 12:36:10 AM] BYA: wat do at park other than ride bikes [5/29/2014 12:36:12 AM] BYA: and walk [5/29/2014 12:36:21 AM] Cakes: helicopter dick [5/29/2014 12:36:44 AM] Pancakes: sand in your penis (y) [5/29/2014 12:37:36 AM] Cakes: it's in ur PEEHOLE u RITARD w h e n i w a t c h _____ , m y h a n d a u t o m a t i c a l l y _____ - phrase Presumably derivative of Twitch chat, particularly Kripp's stream. I'm fairly certain that Twitch chat is at least partially responsible for the XS group chat's deterioration. [6/21/2014 11:48:19 PM] Cakes: wha- [6/21/2014 11:48:31 PM] Cakes: pancakes's tinker [6/21/2014 11:48:36 PM] Cakes: doesn't have soul ring [6/21/2014 11:48:42 PM] Cakes: and is rushing linken's after his bottle and bots [6/21/2014 11:48:46 PM] Cakes: what the sex am i wathcing [6/21/2014 11:49:38 PM] Cakes: w h e n i w a t c h p a n c a k e s , m y h a n d a u t o m a t i c a l l y g e t a i d s you don't belong in this country - phrase Something I used to say while we were in Japan, mainly in response to Tiffy's inquiries about Japanese society. Now mainly used by Tiffy to highlight my failure to adapt to China. [6/17/2014 7:47:20 PM] Tiffy: mango im gna bike over to ur house right now [6/17/2014 7:47:21 PM] Tiffy: and im gonna bomb u [6/17/2014 7:47:29 PM] Mango: the guards will stop you [6/17/2014 7:47:32 PM] Tiffy: wha- [6/17/2014 7:47:36 PM] Tiffy: but they didn't last time [6/17/2014 7:47:39 PM] Tiffy: u fage [6/17/2014 7:47:49 PM] Tiffy: >implying chinese guards do shit [6/17/2014 7:48:04 PM] Tiffy: u dont belong in this cuntree ! (exclamation mark) - punctuation Used to symbolize that a clause isn't serious. As a trend, the number of exclamation marks correspond to the lack of seriousness. [6/25/2014 11:59:36 PM] Michlolz: yea im out [6/25/2014 11:59:39 PM] Michlolz: after that game [6/25/2014 11:59:41 PM] Tiffy: i... [6/25/2014 11:59:50 PM] Cakes: well... [6/25/2014 11:59:54 PM] Cakes: i can 3 queue with you and mango if you really want [6/25/2014 11:59:56 PM] Tiffy: dong just left [6/25/2014 11:59:59 PM] Tiffy: sex u michlolz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [6/26/2014 12:00:02 AM] Michlolz: ya u go [6/26/2014 12:00:06 AM] Michlolz: im gonna [6/26/2014 12:00:11 AM] Michlolz: collect my rares!!! [6/26/2014 12:00:25 AM] Tiffy: guys get mags!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [6/26/2014 12:00:29 AM] Tiffy: we need a 5 astack!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [6/26/2014 12:00:49 AM] Mango: pretty sure not even nabisco uses this many exclamation marks [6/26/2014 12:00:58 AM] Tiffy: sex you mango!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [6/26/2014 12:01:00 AM] Cakes: sex u mango [6/26/2014 12:01:04 AM] Tiffy: it's because of you we can't 5 stack!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! write the gazelle - phrase Hey, I wrote it, right? [6/21/2014 1:28:41 AM] Brah: maybe you should write the gazelle mango [6/21/2014 1:28:49 AM] Brah: myb u shud rite gisele [6/21/2014 1:29:12 AM] Cakes: YES. [6/21/2014 1:30:04 AM] Mango: hm [6/21/2014 1:30:20 AM] Mango: this is happening so often you start to see patterns [6/21/2014 1:30:32 AM] Mango: you generally respect and leave alone the consonants [6/21/2014 1:30:49 AM] Brah: the pattern here is [6/21/2014 1:30:53 AM] Brah: every time the gazelle is late [6/21/2014 1:30:55 AM] Brah: the spelling gets worse [6/21/2014 1:31:18 AM] Mango: are you saying [6/21/2014 1:31:24 AM] Mango: that the terrible spelling in this chat [6/21/2014 1:31:26 AM] Mango: is all my fault [6/21/2014 1:31:31 AM] Cakes: yes. [6/21/2014 1:31:32 AM] Brah: absoeltuealty [6/21/2014 1:31:44 AM] Sharp: defiantly Notes [6/19/2014 12:59:55 AM] Tiffy: MANGO WHERE THE sex IS THE GAZELLE [6/19/2014 1:00:00 AM] Tiffy: YOU SAID YOU WERE WRITING IT OVER SENIOR TRIP [6/19/2014 1:00:02 AM] Tiffy: YOU sexING LIAR [6/19/2014 1:00:04 AM] Mango: I was [6/19/2014 1:00:05 AM] Tiffy: I SAW YOU [6/19/2014 1:00:08 AM] Tiffy: YOU NEVER WROTE JACK SHIT [6/19/2014 1:00:09 AM] Mango: then I went persona [6/19/2014 1:00:12 AM] Tiffy: ALL YOU DID WAS PLAY PERSONA 4 [6/19/2014 1:00:45 AM] Mango: ya I may have included more quotes in this issues than in all of the issues combined. Oh well. In retrospect, I'm starting to regret not actually posting this stuff weekly. Maybe if I knew back then that all I needed to do was copy-paste quotes, then I'd have been a bit more on schedule. Then again, I probably wouldn't have made any deadlines anyway: [6/26/2014 11:32:54 PM] Tiffy: where is the gazelle, mango [6/26/2014 11:33:05 PM] Mango: do not worry [6/26/2014 11:33:12 PM] Mango: if it's not up by the end of month [6/26/2014 11:33:21 PM] Mango: uh [6/26/2014 11:33:30 PM] Tiffy: then you shoot yourself in the dick [6/26/2014 11:33:32 PM] Tiffy: ok!!! [6/26/2014 11:33:53 PM] Mango: I'll think about it after I miss the deadline [6/26/2014 11:34:08 PM] Cakes: i..... [6/26/2014 11:34:24 PM] Sharp: On 6/26/14, at 11:33 PM, Mango wrote: > I'll think about it after I miss the deadline bullshit [6/26/2014 11:34:35 PM] Sharp: you'll just add your punishment onto the list of thiings you'll never do!!! [6/26/2014 11:35:02 PM] Mango: well if you really want to enforce it [6/26/2014 11:35:08 PM] Mango: a quarter of you know where I live [6/26/2014 11:36:43 PM] Tiffy: mango im gonna cum to ur house [6/26/2014 11:36:49 PM] Tiffy: and jizz over ur doormat [6/26/2014 11:36:56 PM] Mango: I don't have a doormat [6/26/2014 11:36:59 PM] Cakes: i... But this is what makes the Weekly Gazelle what it is, right? oreo? Edited by SSMango, Jul 2 2014, 05:10 AM.
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9:55 AM Jul 11