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| Watching Any Good Serials? | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Apr 12 2006, 09:28 AM (88,276 Views) | |
| Laughing Gravy | Nov 9 2012, 10:30 AM Post #2221 |
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Clancy of the Mounted, ch. 4: The Storm Well, let’s see here…. Oh, yeah, Tom and Ann had ridden off a cliff. Whoops. Well, the wagon ends up about 100,000 toothpicks, but Tom ends up with a sore wrist and Ann is just fine. Not only that, but the crash apparently knocked the bullet out of Bill, the driver, and HE’S fine, too! Whew! Luck-EE, as Napoleon Dynamite would say, if he watched serials. Since everything is going so well, Ann lets herself be captured again so as we maintain our interest in this thing. The Anti-Lynch Mob meets with the Chief Inspector, and he brings out Steve, who scolds them all for trying to rescue him (“Don’t do ANYTHING like that again!” he says, rather ungratefully). Meanwhile, the evil Pierre reports erroneously to his boss, “Sergeant Tom, he is keeled.” He then demands his portion of the Gold Mine; “You’ll get what’s coming to you,” he’s told, and he’s too stupid to figure out what THAT means. If Pierre worked for Blofeld, he’d probably spend half his time standing on the stairway over the piranha pool. Shit, he’d probably take his meals there, and maybe put up a cot for naps over it. Meanwhile, Sgt. Tom, who has not been keeled at all, is on his way to Moosehead to rescue Ann, being in as he’s a Mountie and that sort of thing is expected of him, when he’s waylaid by one of her guards, who attempts to stick him with a dagger. “I’ll fix YOU so you won’t handle a knife any more!” Sgt. Tom promises, and I lean forward, excitedly expecting him to cut the guy’s hands off, but no – he merely handcuffs him to a tree. “If I happen to be back this way, I’ll take you back to town!” he laughs, and when I say “laughs”, I mean Tom Tyler doesn’t laugh at all. He’s actually the least-likely-to-smile serial hero EVER. He’s like Buster Keaton in jodhpurs. Well, we have other serials to discuss, so I’ll skip a bit: Tom rescues her but loses his horse and they have to walk home. A big storm hits and they attempt to cross a rickety ol’ bridge, the dummies, and it’s struck by lightning and they fall to their apparent dooms. I sure hope they don’t get keeled. Next, ch. 5: A Desperate Chance! The Mystery Squadron, ch. 4: Men of Steel Placing the shiny metal disc marked “The Mystery Squadron” into my DVD player is like checking into the Motel 6 in Stupidville or watching the Fox News Channel. I just feel it’s harmful to my brain. “Miss Gray and the Black Ace are in the closet!” somebody yells to start this episode. It appears that Dr. Flint is the Black Ace, which means he probably isn’t. He doesn’t have a bullet hole in his arm, for one thing, although later on we see him clutching the arm, so maybe he has three arms, one of which he keeps tightly bound behind his back. He gets away but Bob & Jellybean take off in pursuit in one of his own planes, using the flamethrower to make him land. Alas, the locals think that means that our heroes are actually our villains, picking on the nice doctor for no reason. A fight ensues, then a chase, then they grab our boys and a couple of nooses. Yeah, let’s move on. Next, ch. 5: The Death Swoop! The Master Mystery, ch. 8: The Challenge Houdini wriggles free from the barbed wire (he’s, like, the greatest wriggler in history and I’m just sorry he didn’t live long enough to play Plastic Man, he would’ve been perfect). Springing into action (he does, too, completely “springing” in the classic sense of the word) he hits one thug with a fist, another with a bottle, and yet another with a chair (there’s usin’ all the weapons at your disposal) and rescues his girlfriend. The darn plot gets VERY complicated, though, as one of the villains goes to get his fortune told by an old lady with no teeth. Turns out that the girlfriend has a half-sister she didn’t know about; Brent has “secretly married” his secretary (yeah, right) and then the marriage was annulled and the offspring given to the Toothless Lady to raise. Thus, the girlfriend now only has ½ of a vote in determining what happens to those patents that we’d forgotten the serial was actually about. While we’re pondering all that, Houdini gets captured again, tossed down an elevator shaft, and the “Down” button gets pressed, and firmly, too. They press it 3 or 4 times to make certain. Next, ch. 9: The Madagascan Menace! Flaming Frontiers, ch. 5: Blood and Gold As we recall from last week (maybe), a piano fell on Tex Houston. Only he rolled out of the way at the last second! Oh, it must’ve been a piano roll! HA HA HA HA HA HA! I crack myself up, he said, wiping a tear from his baby-blue eye. Hee, hee, hee! Sorry, folks, I’ll calm down in a moment. “Piano roll.” Heh-heh. Okay, so… whee! This is fun. Uh, so, anyway, the evil Eaton guy orders his men to have a bar fight so’s he can pretend to fire them and they can all go work for the good guys and cause trouble over THERE. They do it, mister, let me tell you. “Took him a long time to discover those guys were no good!” somebody says (although who would ever assume that Roy Bancroft could be a good guy is beyond me). Tex and his pals ride off, but are attacked, apparently by Indians but probably not. In any case, they’re rescued by Buffalo Bill, who shows up at the most opportune times in this serial, don’t he, folks? He’s like the Phantom’s dog, sort of. Only with nicer hair. While all this is going on, Eaton’s men kidnap Bob Grant and order him to sign over the deed to his gold mine “if he knows what’s good for him,” which he apparently doesn’t. And while THAT’S going on, Tex gets trapped in a mine shaft that gets all blowed up. Next, ch. 6: Trapped by Fire! |
| "I'm glad that this question came up, because there are so many ways to answer it that one of them is bound to be right." - Robert Benchley | |
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| Laughing Gravy | Nov 18 2012, 09:46 AM Post #2222 |
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Clancy of the Mounted, ch. 5: A Desperate Chance! While the storm howls outside my window in Sacramento, the weather matches it in this week’s chapter. You’d think Canadians would have more sense than to cross a bridge during a thunderstorm, but then, throughout history we’ve been over-estimating Canadians, haven’t we? Anyway, Tom and his entourage land in the lake below and two of them swim to safety, although what is considered “safety” when you’re in the middle of a lake in the middle of a typhoon, I’m not sure. “I thought we never would get out of that water, Tom,” Ann says, noting that their prisoner drowned, although they’re not all that concerned. The next morning, a couple of Mounties find our twosome, and barely raise an eyebrow that they’ve spent the night together in the woods. I myself raised an eyebrow, and I knew they hadn’t “done anything.” Tom takes Ann to stay with Steve’s wife and heads back to town, where he’s lambasted by his friend Moran: “Ya oughtta be ashamed of yourself, arrestin’ your own brother!” With nothing much else to go on, they discuss the case so far (there IS a case, right?) and somebody recalls that Simon Slade, a hot-tempered local trapper, had worked for John Laurie and had been discharged not long before Laurie was found dead. Golly, that seems like a thread worth following, but Tom says, ““I’m going to do some plainclothes work among the Indians.” Ann sneaks up to Slade’s cabin to confront him, but he’s not there, and eventually even slow-witted Sgt. Tom makes his way over there, where he and Ann barely miss shooting each other. It’s okay, though, because the villains show up sooner or later and THEY don’t intend to barely miss. Tom and Ann flee on horseback with the usual not-cold pursuit going on, and as quick as you can say, “Gee, they’re not going to fall off their horse again, are they?” Tom and Ann fall off their horse again. Next week, ch. 6: The Wolf’s Fangs! The Mystery Squadron, ch. 5: The Death Swoop Once again, it’s time to hike up Stupidity Mountain. As we may recall, our heroes (and I use that term as loosely as possible) had been mistaken for Mystery Flyers (the bad guys) last week and were about to be strung up. This week, the boys grab a prisoner, but release him in exchange for the dam workers/lynch mob promising to repair the phone lines and call Mr. Gray, whom, they promise, will clear them. Gray is on his way to the camp with his lovely daughter, however, and some shapely machine guns, but Dr. Flint convinces the men he’s on the up and up and he takes a mystery plane and makes his escape. The Black Ace, figuring he should do SOMETHING in this episode, orders his men to stop Gray from arriving at the dam. So, thinking quickly (they only have 18 minutes, you see), the Ace’s men fly over the camp and drop a threat that the dam workers had better “Release our two men!” or face serious consequences of an unspecified nature. “They’re not gonna fool us any more, are they, boys?” the lynch mob says. Meanwhile, Bob Steele and Big Boy Guinn have spent all this time just sitting around in the garage waiting for the phone lines to be fixed. Just when I’m convinced that this is the single dullest serial chapter in history that’s doesn’t star Herman Brix as Tarzan, Gray and his daughter get stopped by some of the Black Ace’s men, who tell him, “Your two flyers cracked up!” They convince Gray to follow them up a dark, deserted road away from everything and everyone and drive into a barn(!). The serial isn’t the only thing that’s stupid ‘round here, folks. “Dad, we’re TRAPPED!” Dorothy says, pointing out a little bit of the obvious. They look out a small window and see the villains laughing and clapping, which annoys Dorothy. She gets behind the wheel herself, tells papa to hang on, and crashes right through the barn door in one of the most exciting scenes I’ve ever seen in a serial (hey, I can compliment when warranted). Everybody gives chase, the villains (for once) are the ones who drive off a cliff, and Gray and daughter speed toward the dam, where our heroes (and I roll my eyes every time I use that term to describe our leading men) have nooses around their necks. “Happy landings!” are their final words to each other. Not needed, though, because Gray arrives in the nick of time and vouches for his boys. The Black Ace’s men, circling above, are so annoyed by this that they turn on the flame thrower and fly low over the crowd. The boys grab the machine guns, shoot him down, grab his uniform and his plane (which lands perfectly safely, despite the pilot’s death; yep, the Stupid Switch was flicked ON again) and fly into the Black Ace’s headquarters, where naturally – not really having much of a plan after they got in there – they’re captured and shot. Next, ch. 6: Doomed! (I’ll say.) Dick Tracy, ch. 1: The Spider Strikes A bunch of guys meet on a train; they’re going to be having a rendezvous with their boss, the Spider, a lame guy with one giant pimp-heeled shoe. Byron Foulger, the mousy, rat-like character actor who always plays a simp, has grown a set for this serial, and announces his intention to leave the Spider’s employ (“Are we SHEEP that we follow him blindly?”). The Spider shows up, scares the shit out of everybody, and then follows Byron home and shoots him on his doorstep, but not before shining a spider-shaped flashlight on his forehead, the kind of trademarked coolness that you don’t find in many criminals these days. It seems that a lot of criminals are showing up dead with spider marks on their forehead, and so ace G-Man Dick Tracy is called in with his crack team, which includes a girl, a goofy assistant, and a little boy. The G-Men are having a carnival for the orphans today, and since nothing could be safer than a carnival full of G-Men, immediately somebody is murdered (while the goofy assistant shows the orphan boys how to play football, telling them, “Did I play football? I was the shortstop!”). Turns out the killer was a clown with marionettes, but I forget what clue Tracy used to decipher that, something about sawdust or tinsel or something. “These men were only goons. They didn’t plan the murder,” Tracy opines. Said little kid, Junior, can identify an accomplice that got away, so Tracy adopts him(!). Meanwhile, Tracy’s brother was the attorney for the murdered man, so he runs off to get the dead guy’s paperwork (isn’t there some sort of law against that, or client privilege, or something? Seems wrong, somehow). Speaking of seemingly wrong, a car full of bad guys drives Tracy’s brother off the road and they capture him and take him to Dr. Moloch, a mad scientist who works for the Spider. Moloch performs mental and physical surgery on the brother, making him look like someone else and turning him evil. EVIL! The Spider is pleased. The Spider is also pleased that he’s invented a new death ray, which he points at a flower pot, causing it to shatter, convincing him that he can blow up the new Bay Bridge (opened in November, 1936, I looked it up) with it. He sends a letter of extortion to the Governor, who merely laughs. A chuckle, not really a laugh. I mean, not a guffaw or anything. In any case, Dick Tracy studies the note, notices that the letters are rather faint except for the “g”, deduces that the machine has recently been repaired to fix a missing letter, and sends his crack squad out to all the typewriter repair shops in the area. While that’s going on, he rushes to the Bay Bridge for the dedication. In a beautifully edited sequence (see, I notice this stuff), the Governor gives a nice speech (“This is more than just a bridge, it symbolizes a highway to a greater civilization!”), a giant flying wing aircraft buzzes the crowd, the Bridge starts to shimmy and shake, Dick Tracy is crushed by a girder, and we’re all left in the lurch for seven full days. Next, ch. 2: The Bridge of Terror! The Master Mystery, ch. 9: The Madagascan Menace Harry Houdini turns out to be as good a roller as he is a wriggler, and he rolls out of the elevator shaft to safety. He chastises Zita for not helping him, and she’s really sorry, but someday he’s going to recognize what a stinker she is. Meanwhile, the villains have convinced the virginal Eva that a man has come from Madagascar who can cure her father of the illness that we’ve forgotten about (it was way back in chapter 1, and frankly, we didn’t care back then, as I recall). “Master, the STRANGLER has arrived from Madagascar,” the henchman announces, and I don’t know why they call him the STRANGLER, because his real name, apparently, is Long Fang, which is a much cooler name for an Oriental villain (you didn’t know Madagascar was even IN the Orient, did ja?). While Eva’s life is in serious danger from Mr. Fang, Houdini is captured (he’s a lot better at getting’ out of traps than he is at avoidin’ them) and trussed up to a garrote and slowly strangled to death. Ouch. Next, ch. 10: The Binding Wheel Flaming Frontiers, ch. 6: Trapped by Fire Tex Houston survives the explosion at the mine (he’s only knocked off his feet, so it seems) and goes looking for Tom Grant; he hopes that the caved-in mine hasn’t become Grant’s tomb. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! I did it again! Man, am I funny! Hee-hee-hee! Grant’s tomb. I slay myself. Well, anywayses, Mary rushes to Tex’s side. They go lookin’ for Tom together. Tex is very upbeat and funny about it, but he tells his buddies that he’s worried poor Tom’s a goner for sure. Next, we cut to Charles Middleton as Daggett, the master villain we all forgot was even in this serial. He berates his men for their constant screw ups, and says, “From now on, I’m dealin’!” He arranges for Tex to have, um, an “accident” but Bill Cody rides in to the rescue yet again. Meanwhile, the local Indians get all stirred up about something (this IS a Western, after all), and Mary is nabbed and taken to her captive brother, where she’s threatened with doom or harm or something unless he signs over that stupid mine. “How’s dad?” Tom asks. “He’s dead,” Mary replies. “Just when I was going to make things easy for him!” Tom exclaims. The villains finally decide on a plan of action: since Tom won’t sign, they’re going to sell Mary to the Indians and within a week or two, they vow, “You won’t be able to tell her from a SQUAW!” They promise that the Indians will wipe all the spunk out of her. Oh, my. I was laughing so hard at that I forgot to write down what peril Tex had gotten himself into. My guess is that he probably fell off his horse. Next, ch. 7: The Human Target |
| "I'm glad that this question came up, because there are so many ways to answer it that one of them is bound to be right." - Robert Benchley | |
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| Laughing Gravy | Nov 20 2012, 01:59 PM Post #2223 |
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My look at the new 75th anniversary Dick Tracy DVD release is up at http://inthebalcony.com/cliffhanger/ |
| "I'm glad that this question came up, because there are so many ways to answer it that one of them is bound to be right." - Robert Benchley | |
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| Monsieur X | Nov 20 2012, 07:29 PM Post #2224 |
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Balcony Gang, Foist Class
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If that picture of Byron with the spider on his forehead is an actual framegrab from the DVD, that looks absolutely amazing! |
| "I would never want to belong to a club that would have someone like me as a member" -- Groucho Marx | |
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| Laughing Gravy | Nov 20 2012, 07:55 PM Post #2225 |
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It is. |
| "I'm glad that this question came up, because there are so many ways to answer it that one of them is bound to be right." - Robert Benchley | |
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| riddlerider | Nov 21 2012, 06:34 AM Post #2226 |
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Balcony Gang, Foist Class
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I got the new Tracy in a big batch o' stuff I ordered from VCI yesterday. Looking forward to seeing this one again. |
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| Laughing Gravy | Nov 30 2012, 09:48 AM Post #2227 |
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Clancy of the Mounted, ch. 6: The Wolf's Fangs As we recall, our desperadoes had chased Tom and Ann until they fell off their horses, but thankfully they landed softly and safely on a soft bed of granite on the floor of a concrete cannon 100 yards below. "Ann, that was a close call," Tom points out helpfully. For the sixth time in six chapters, the villains say, "Well, THEY'RE dead" without checking, and go to report to their boss, who will run out of patience for this inaccuracy sooner or later. Tom and Ann walk back to town, smiling at stock footage of mooseses, and Ann discloses that she'd written a letter to her Pa about the mine; this finally gives Tom an idea of a motive for the murder (a Canadian lightbulb appears magically over his head). While he investigates, Ann is frightened by stock footage of a coyote. Wolf Fang, the devilish renegade half-breed (I don't know for SURE that's what he is, but that's what ALL villainous Indians are referred to in serials, so I assume) is brought in to finally kill Tom dead AND check his pulse afterwards (and probably put a mirror under his nose, too) and he has his men jump him in the cabin, bullets and knives and tomahawks and chairs and lamps and packing peanuts (well, they LOOKED like packing peanuts to ME) are thrown, and Tom keels right over. Let’s check him. Next, ch. 7: The Night Attack! The Mystery Squadron, ch. 6: Doomed Time once again to set up the board and play a lengthy game of Stupidopoly. This is a rather confusing episode, funny because the whole serial was obviously intended for six-year-olds. And not quick-witted, smart six-year-olds, neither. In any case, Jellybean helps Bob Steele escape but the Black Ace gets away. Over the next two reels, our two so-called heroes nab at least three guys they think is the Black Ace, but none of them apparently are. The whole nonsense about the hole in the arm has been forgotten, too. And to add to the confusion, for the second chapter in a row we’ve got a flashback to chapter one! So let’s just skip the plot for a bit, shall we? In search of the Black Ace, Gray and eight of his men climb into his sedan and give chase. Now, picture nine grown men climbing into a sedan… Picturing that? Yep, circus clowns. I thought of that, too. Dorothy decides to look for the Ace from the air, and takes off – NOT NOTICING THE ACE IS IN THE OTHER SEAT ON THE PLANE. Yes, really. She’s so near-sighted, apparently, that no church steeple in town is safe when SHE’S piloting. The Black Ace (the real one, I guess) orders Dorothy to jump out. She tosses her parachute over instead. “When you crash, remember, you asked for it!” he says and HE jumps out instead. She merely takes over the controls again. Steele chases Johnson, whom he thinks is the Black Ace (he’s the guy who stands to gain the most if the dam don’t get built, so he’s probably right) through a secret passage, but when he nails him, ANOTHER Black Ace appears in the secret doorway in the fireplace and blows everybody up. Or something. I dunno. It was stupid, I can assure you of that. Next, ch. 7: Enemy Signals! The Master Mystery, ch. 10: The Binding Wheel Houdini, a master wriggler, manages to escape from the bonds on his arms and legs and “runs around the wall” (looking just like Curly Howard doing the “chicken with his head cut off” routine) until Eva can come rescue him. (The scene of Houdini running in circles around a wall while is neck is tied to a garrote is impressive beyond belief, folks, worth watching the whole serial to see, seriously.) Eva announces she’s breaking her engagement to Paul to marry Houdini (it’s complicated if you haven’t been following the plot, but she had no intention of marrying Paul in the first place, it was all a ruse; Eva isn’t the slutty flirt you think she is. At least, I don’t THINK so. Maybe). Long Fang, wearing a loud tie and a pimp hat, attack Houdini and a desperate struggle ensues. Zita, in the next room, calms the household by saying, “Don’t be alarmed, it’s was merely an altercation between the servants.” Houdini is trussed up and put into a secret compartment in a couch(!), which is then stabbed with swords. Ouch. That’s the end of chapter 10; alas, chapter 11 is mostly missing. We discover that Houdini wasn’t in the couch at all (whew!) but his escape is short-lived and, in search of Eva, who has been kidnapped by Paul so he can FORCE her to marry him so that he can get the valuable patents that none of us care about, Houdini heads to a shack on the pier, where he’s tied up and dumped into a fish net, and my isn’t THIS sentence ramblin’ on and on and on? With Harry helpless (maybe), the automaton lopes after Eva. Next, ch. 12: The Death Noose! Flaming Frontiers, ch. 7: A Human Target Oh, yeah… Tom was tied up helpless in the cellar with the cabin on fire, but Tex rescues him, thankfully for all of us (including the bad guys, who need him). By the way, I haven’t mentioned it, but the opening credits to each episode show an ACTUAL frontier aflame. It’s pretty darn impressive. Anyway, Thundercloud, son of the chief of the local tribe, is working with Tex and he drives off the banditos. Middleton’s men need to lay low for a while, and Middleton tells them to hide in their hideout, since Tex would never THINK they’d go back there. Within five minutes, Tex says, “I’ll bet they went back to their old headquarters, thinking I wouldn’t think of that! They’re plenty smart!” Uh, right. Tom is framed for Murkle’s death (I could explain that subplot, but it doesn’t matter and plus it’s been a long day, what with four serial chapters and all) and is arrested, tried and convicted in a very nice montage that looks like a prototype for a film noir, with long shadows of bars cast horizontally over a closeup of Tom’s anguished face. It looks like an outtake from Passion of Joan of Arc with a cowboy playing Joan, actually. In any case, Tex – over at the headquarters – falls down a well. Uh, what, now? Next, ch. 8: The Savage Horde! (OOOH! Good title!) |
| "I'm glad that this question came up, because there are so many ways to answer it that one of them is bound to be right." - Robert Benchley | |
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| Laughing Gravy | Dec 8 2012, 04:49 PM Post #2228 |
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Mystery Squadron, ch. 7: Enemy Signals In the grand scheme of things, this serial isn't particularly stupider than 200 other serials I've seen... but it sure seems like it. The "explosion" from the fireplace was only a smoke bomb to enable Johnson (one of at least a dozen guys who've been "proven" to be the Black Ace, so far) to escape; Steele gives chase through the myriad of secret passageways dotting the lodge. Hogwarts didn't hold as many secret rooms as THIS dump. Anyway, Steele finds Bracken, and forces him to call the Black Ace on the secret Mystery Squadron radiograph, which isn't nearly as cool as it sounds, and arrange to meet the Ace at his hideout. Steele then grabs a Mystery Squadron plane and flies there, not knowing that due to a special secret Mystery Squadron code, his ass is cooked. Well, sort of - with the help of Jellybean, his ass remains raw enough to suit him. He unmasks Collins as the REAL Black Ace, only Collins isn't REALLY the REAL Black Ace, who has arrived with a whole bunch of heavily armed men, who lighten their loads by depositing 147 rounds of ammo into our heroes. Next, ch. 8: The Canyon of Calamity! The Master Mystery, ch. 12: The Death Noose Houdini wriggles free (what a wriggler he's turned out to be) and tosses the fish net over the automaton; let me tell you, robots can do an awfully lot of impressive things, but escape from a fish net ain't one of 'em. Harry and Eva tell the evil conspirator they've gotten control of the stock in the patent company that none of us care about; they tell him he's through, to clear out, but he merely smokes and looks out the window and hatches another evil plan. "Hours of evil cunning shape the ruse" the title card says, and isn't THAT something you have to read 2 or 3 times to understand! Well, the ruse consists of killing Houdini with chlorine gas and sending Eva to a hypnotist to "cure her father" but actually to put her under a spell so that she marries the villain. The latter part is working well enough, but the first part is spoiled by Zita, who turns good again and saves Harry. He asks her how come she alternates between trying to kill him and rescuing him (something I'd ask her, too, were she here) and she responds that she tries to dislike him, but darn it, her heart just won't let her. Awwee. Somebody get me a tissue. Harry heads off to rescue Eva again, but he's captured (naturally) and hung by the neck(!) while the automaton's eyeball death beams (a recent innovation) reach out for Zita. Ouch, what a painful cliffhanger THIS is! Next, ch. 13: The Flash of Death! Flaming Frontiers, ch. 8: The Savage Horde In one of the lamest cliffhanger solutions EVER, Tex merely crawls out of the well he'd fallen into, none the worse for wear. In fact, his clothes are noticeably cleaner, too. Tex frees Little Bear, but Daggett convinces the Chief that it was Tex behind his son's disappearance after all and the Redskins attack the town. Mary is caught in a stampede and trampled and yeah, not a whole lot happened this week, obviously. Next, ch. 9: Toll of the Torrent! |
| "I'm glad that this question came up, because there are so many ways to answer it that one of them is bound to be right." - Robert Benchley | |
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| Laughing Gravy | Dec 16 2012, 03:52 PM Post #2229 |
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The Mystery Squadron, ch. 8: The Canyon of Calamity Time once again to dial 1-800-STUPID and see who answers. Let's see.. Well, the 147 rounds of ammo missed, so that's fine, then. The chapter contains yet another flashback to chapter one (or maybe two. Or maybe chapter two WAS a flashback to chapter one; nothin' about this serial would surprise ME any more). "Don't worry," Jellybean tells the captive Mystery Squadronaires reassuringly, "you won't be in jail more than two weeks. Then they'll HANG you." Funny guy, that Jellybean. The good guys trail the bad guys to their hideout, which is the same hideout Robot Monster and It Conquered the World used. Four or five more guys are "revealed" as the Black Ace, but none of them really are. And a car goes over the cliff, but I forget who was in it. Next, ch. 9: Secret of the Mine! The Master Mystery, ch. 13: The Flash of Death Houdini wriggles his way out of the ropes around his wrists, hoists himself up and over the chandelier he's being hung from, and knocks all the villains into a pit of some sort that's conveniently placed where he can reach it. Zita then helps him rescue Eva (Zita, we're told, has arrived at the "crossroads of conscience" and decided to join the good guys) and they get away. After that, well, somebody realized there's only a couple more chapters left to go and they'd better get the plot movin', so we spend a couple of talky reels with Houdini trying to find the birth certificate that would prove whether or not Zita is 1/2 heiress to the patent company (I've not talked about the plot more in this serial because it's boring and nobody cares; I know, I know, you're thinkin', "That never stopped ol' Gravy before." Shut up). Houdini hides a pretty cool secret camera in the den of the mansion, which reveals that Balcom is a villain and that there's a secret door to the underground hideout. Say, turning female henchmen to his side, romancin' the dames, having cool gadgets, getting out of tricky deathtraps... Harry Houdini is a LOT like James Bond in this film. Anyway, he goes through the secret entrance and has a big fight with Balcom, who blows up the cave and showers both of them with rocks and stones and dust and probably bat guano, while Zita and Eva are captured by some really, really, REALLY menacing-looking thugs. Next, penultimate chapter: The Tangled Web! Flaming Frontiers, ch. 9: Toll of the Torrent Y'know, I really want to like this serial, and there's certainly nothing WRONG with it, I guess, but it's just not turnin' me on. I dunno, it's rather flat. I appreciate that for a Universal western serial, it's one of the better ones, with slightly less silent stock footage of Indian attacks from the 1920s than you usually see in these things. A nice musical score, too. So, anyway, this was a good week for gettin' things cleared up. Tex rescues Mary (rather easily) from the stampede, but her brother Tom is captured by the guys who want his gold mine, and they use... the ol' CHINESE WATER TORTURE on him! Uh, I mean, "enhanced interrogation techniques". The Indians discover that the Chief's son is just fine and so they call off the warpath ("Me savvy!" one of 'em says). Tex rides off in search of Tom, but he's jumped by the desperadoes, who leave his unconscious body in the cabin just as the dam breaks and the flood washes it away! Wow! Next, ch. 10: In the Claws of the Cougar! WOW again! |
| "I'm glad that this question came up, because there are so many ways to answer it that one of them is bound to be right." - Robert Benchley | |
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| panzer the great & terrible | Dec 16 2012, 04:39 PM Post #2230 |
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Mouth Breather
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I hate to see you suffer like this, Mr. G. Maybe it's time to watch something decent again. Just a little suggestion. |
| Life is just a bowl of cherries, it's too mysterious, don't take it serious... | |
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| Pa Stark | Dec 16 2012, 06:31 PM Post #2231 |
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Charter Member
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I'm with you, Panzer. May I suggest for Gravy's next serials, he should watch: CHICK CARTER, DETECTIVE SON OF THE GUARDSMAN QUEEN OF THE JUNGLE JUNGLE MENACE |
| Honest and Lovable Pa Stark | |
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| Laughing Gravy | Dec 16 2012, 06:44 PM Post #2232 |
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Look for In The Balcony on Facebook!
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What on earth makes anybody think I'm suffering? |
| "I'm glad that this question came up, because there are so many ways to answer it that one of them is bound to be right." - Robert Benchley | |
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| Pa Stark | Dec 16 2012, 11:11 PM Post #2233 |
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Charter Member
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You will be if you try and sit through those serials. Hint: Remember HOP HARRIGAN? These aren't any better
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| Honest and Lovable Pa Stark | |
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| Laughing Gravy | Dec 16 2012, 11:56 PM Post #2234 |
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Look for In The Balcony on Facebook!
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Not sure if I'll watch another batch of serials right after these. Things are kinda busy around here these days. For the record, I thought Clancy of the Mounted was very good, and I think the Houdini serial is terrific but too long. He's an amazing performer, and man, was this thing crafted to show off his skills. I find Flaming Frontiers to be rather routine, which is what I feel about most western serials unless there's some hook (a masked hero or something) that draws me in. The Mystery Squadron? In case I haven't mentioned it, it's stupid. Really, juvenile, even as serials go. |
| "I'm glad that this question came up, because there are so many ways to answer it that one of them is bound to be right." - Robert Benchley | |
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| panzer the great & terrible | Dec 17 2012, 11:01 PM Post #2235 |
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Mouth Breather
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Hold it. Now juvenile is bad? |
| Life is just a bowl of cherries, it's too mysterious, don't take it serious... | |
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6:52 AM Jul 11