| #3: 06/24/16; Searching for Safety | |
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| Topic Started: Jun 25 2016, 02:00 AM (13 Views) | |
| Jenna | Jun 25 2016, 02:00 AM Post #1 |
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Trying to get one Confessional in each day to reflect on my thoughts, what's been going on, etc. I didn't hop on much in the morning, due to work, and even though we half day Fridays in the summer...I managed to pass out from about 2pm to 6pm. So, at that point I awoke to exactly one message from everyone on the Tribe, and felt like I had a lot of apologizing to do, so nobody felt I was ignoring them. The main people I really chatted with today were Ryan and Janet. I think Ryan was making up for lost time and looking ahead to not being around much this weekend due to outside forces. I really liked the connection we started form and he seems like he'd be an engaged player...but (if what I heard from Rob is true), almost everyone universally has said they haven't heard much from Ryan. So even though I told him I'd have his back (NOTE: Not an Alliance), if we lose Sunday, he may be an early boot. Dan is also up there...I feel like he's trying to socialize and just not well-practiced at it in this format...so I kind of feel bad for him. Whether he has social anxiety or struggles with textual conversation...I want to give him the benefit of the doubt. On to Janet. Rob told me Joanna likes her. Rob also said she's indicated she has a fondness for Roger. Now I start getting worried because I've dropped SEVERAL hints to Janet that I trust her and like the vibe I get from her...but each step I take in the direction of "Let's watch out for each other," she manages to take two steps back and dismiss any game talk at all. Not a good feeling only in that it does not make me feel safe. And likewise with Joanna...as much as I've felt a good connection with her, I'm not getting any reciprocity back, except via Rob (who says she's cool with me). Then there's Roger...we've had playful flirt-like chats going...but nothing more. So I need to escalate to gameplay. Not just with him, but with everyone. Usually when I play these I try to find 3-4 people I feel safe with...then 3-4 people I can make feel safe. I think this time things are different...I'm just trying to make myself feel safe with everyone...as long as I'm not #1 on anyone's list, I'll be happy. Preferably not even #2. I do like Christy, and want to trust her. So hoping I can chat with her more over the weekend. So, if we lose Sunday (and tribes are the same and unaffected by whatever twist/news is happening on Saturday), right now...I'd push for Dan to go first, only because I've heard the least from him. But I'm also not in any position TO push...so I think everyone else might want Ryan. But...if I can't get some first game talk or common ground with Janet...I wouldn't mind having her go first, just to make me feel safer. Again...only because I am getting no sense she wants much to do with me. And then there's Rob. The one person I've told I have their back 100% and who has told me the same thing. Whose told me he trusts me by a mile. He knows A LOT. Meaning people are trusting him A LOT to tell him things. He knows who Joanna trusts. He know that Janet and Roger have a bond. He's at the center of a lot...and that can be dangerous. It's early still...but I need to keep my eye on that. Also...I think I need to pull back on the sex kitten/peanut butter/handcuffs and ferrets talk. I suck at playing Jenna. So may have to revert to just standard gameplayer mode and survive these next couple votes as a fan, not as a character. |
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| BROBST | Jun 25 2016, 02:12 AM Post #2 |
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You give great insight into what's going on from your corner of the game. Many thanks!
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12:56 PM Jul 11