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TWC change
Topic Started: Apr 9 2012, 12:50 AM (675 Views)
Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
[ *  *  * ]
I changed the voting incentive, since april fools are over and you've all fapped enough over the lizard tits.
I haven't yet made a new picture so its just the three roguish Eslum again.
But that one was always a favourite of mine, so its back till I make something new.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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Thanks Hark, there's nothing left of my knob but a stump now.

I'm thinking that our bereted friend needs to learn not to gamble if he's going to be a sore loser, especially when he's whining to a man much larger than himself.
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Canuovea
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Thank you Hark. Thank you very much.
Resident philosophy and history nut. And amateur swordsman.

"Purple swords? Darsai are weird." -Elyssa

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Harkovast
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If he is disputing the game, Bilbani would be disputing if the way he played it was wrong in theory. By that I mean whether or not he played correctly based on the information he had but in this instance the optimum tactic failed due to chance (but that does not disprove it was the optimum tactics).
Senchos' amusement would come from observing that Bilbani is really reaching for a way to explain why hes been losing all night.

Generally, those three have very witty, but very high brow conversations about philosophy, political theory, science and (most importantly) art.
The three will almost always be engaged in some kind of heated debate, or some sort of dangerous escapade of daring do!
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Canuovea
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Sounds almost like us.

And one of them is a swordsman.

One of them works with projectiles...

One of them is an artist...
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"Purple swords? Darsai are weird." -Elyssa

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Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
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Two of them are gay.
And it aint the artist.

I mean that with referance to the Eslum...not you guys.
But if you are, more power too ya.

"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
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Also, in fairness, all of them are good at sword fighting, projectiles and (especially) art. Those are just the feats they specialise at.

These three are the da vinci's and michealangalo's of the Eslum home islands.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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Quote:
 
Two of them are gay.
And it aint the artist.

I mean that with referance to the Eslum...not you guys.
But if you are, more power too ya.

Yo.

You wouldn't catch me dead in a beret though, not unless it was issued to me along with a weapon.
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Canuovea
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Well, I'm not gay. But I am somewhat proficient with a sword. Or so I'd like to think. So I suppose I sorta qualify.

I also don't have a beret.
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"Purple swords? Darsai are weird." -Elyssa

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Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
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Canouvea Senchos the swordsman has a conquistador helmet rather than a berrett.
I assume you have one of those...I always imagine you wearing one anyway.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Canuovea
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Well, I've a Roman helmet. But I'd be glad for a conquistador helmet too.
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"Purple swords? Darsai are weird." -Elyssa

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Renard
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And no stahlhelms? No one in the world of Harkovast wears stahlhelms?
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Canuovea
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If anyone, I bet the Levengroust would.
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Renard
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I doubt it, if they wear anything Prussian it would probably be pickelhaubes, not stahlhelms. For whatever reason people seem to like helmets with spikes on them.

What are the Levengroust anyway? Hark posted a chart on DD that listed the races and their respective species, but every image posted on the old forum vanished after one of their myriad "updates".
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Harkovast
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Renard is correct.
Spikes on top of helmets are the only way to roll for the Levengroust.
I will get to work reposting some of the old material, such as the currency page and races/magic index.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Canuovea
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Well, I did say "if anyone".
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Harkovast
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I like the way Senchos is clearly getting Bilbani's goat in that picture. I think it gets across quite a lot about the friendships between the characters and how they interract in that image.

I also like how Senchos turned out. He gets more armour because he is the close combat expert, so he needs to be better protected with a breast plate and helmet. I also made him bigger for this reason, so he can get up close and kick ass.
He has a bad ass magic sword enchanted with water magic so it can pass through armour like it was liquid. He uses this with either a dagger or a small buckler shield.
A lot of the new thinkers and adventers of the Eslum favour light armour and weapon that are easier to transport and cheaper to buy compared to the heavy armour and weapons the Eslum Knights wield in battle. A breast plate and rapier you can have on you at all times and be ready to go at a moments notice, compared to a suit of full plate and a two handed sword or warhammer.

I hate having to wait to have characters appear!
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Canuovea
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Damn, Hark! Taking away the effectiveness of armour basically makes the rapier or smallsword or even a light sabre possibly the most effective swords out there. Basically, Senchos sounds awesome, at least when it comes to killing stuff up close.

If he uses a rapier and "main gauche" Hark, even buckler, I suggest watching the "swords of the musketeers" episode of that "Conquest" series on youtube. They spend the first half talking about movie sword stuff... but the second half is really useful.

Heck, I might have linked to it before, but: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LnZgVDiJtPM&feature=related

And I'm really liking the sound of these three characters.
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Renard
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I do like the big guy, probably because he thinks it's hilarious that his friend is being a sore loser.
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Harkovast
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I suppose it wouldn't hurt to mention that Ganobaro has a bolt action repeating crossbow he designed and built and a dagger called "Ash" that is enchanted with the old magic.

But these guys are thinkers, artists and intellectuals first, bad ass warriors second.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Canuovea
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Thats the way to be, really.

Except the artist part. I can't draw for the life of me!

But really, being a thinker, artist, or intellectual is often more useful than if you were to just, oh, know how to kill people. The killing people art only makes you money and allows you to live off it if you are in a military or mercenary profession. Thinkers can do a bunch of shit.
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"Purple swords? Darsai are weird." -Elyssa

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Harkovast
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New pic is up...something a little more interesting.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Canuovea
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Huh.

So we've got angler fish tyranid daemon things?

Actually, I think they're pretty neat. And could have been an alien/demons from another dimension invasion, now that I think about it. Plus, they don't seem to be the KITW's troops... so... hmm... though it is the demon plague, and we know that the KITW appeared soon after. So...
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Harkovast
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Angler fish are one of the freaky-ist things in nature!
They are like concentrated ugly.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Canuovea
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So very true.
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Renard
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Why did you have to give it legs? Angler fish are bad enough when I know that they can't walk on land.
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Canuovea
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Renard, Hark seems to be gunning for giving us more nightmares than any video game we've ever played.

Thing is that, well, in the dark of the night, that light would, in theory, help you run away from them. Unless there is a kind of magic about them that tempts you to come closer...

Imagine being hunted by something like that? It wouldn't even have to run after you, just stay in sight while your will to resist the pull of the light slowly erodes. And then...
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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Do they taste like chicken?
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Harkovast
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Renard- Well I wouldn't eat one...

Canouvea- One of them chasing you would be bad...thousands of them raining from the sky would be worse....
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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The first thing to go through your head when you see a snake isn't usually "I'd eat that", but they're quite good. I'm just going to assume that these bastards taste like chicken, not very creepy then.

And now they fall from the sky by the thousands? Great.
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StyxD
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Yeah, Canuovea's right, I can definitely see something Tyranid about that monster. Not that I don't like the design.

So... is the light on its head magical? As in, if you look at it, you're paralyzed, or maybe it projects an illusion that hides the demon... well, what purpose does it serve?
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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Maybe it's just for appearances? Can we really begrudge a monster for wanting to fancy?
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StyxD
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But by itself, that light is just making it look silly. It's not like it's going to fool anyone that high above sea floor level, and this thing doesn't look like it's readily capable of swimming anyway.
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Harkovast
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The light is (weirdly enough) its sensory organ, though what is "sees" or how things look from its point of view is unknown.
These guys don't stop to chat!
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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How big are they?
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Canuovea
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I'd guess about the size of a gaunt class Tyranid. Maybe larger.

In other words, "too large."
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Harkovast
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Very big dog size.
Smaller than a person but still big enough to kill you horribly.

"Too Large" is pretty accurate!
Also generally too numerous as well!
And way too aggressive!
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Canuovea
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Sounds about right on with the Tyranid gaunts then. I Hate those things, by the way.

Its like a devil Irish Wolf hound with anglerfish tyranid characteristics!

Damn it Hark, you've gone and created a thing of nightmares. Congratulations.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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I don't know what a tyranid is, so comparing the size of one of these bastards to a tyranid doesn't really help me.

Now, "the size of a large dog" is something I can deal with. I've seen very large wolfhounds and Great Danes, so those are things I can compare easily.
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Harkovast
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Well I'm glad that creature went down well with everyone.
I was trying for something quite freaky, with its weird limbs, snarling mouth and head light. Glad it came across well.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Harkovast
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New pic is up!
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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A fox half-caste, nice.

Planning on giving any guns to our vulpine friends?
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Harkovast
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No plans at the minute, but you never know.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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Posted Image

Like that, but anthropomorphic, wearing pants, and with a loaded rifle.
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Harkovast
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Haha, am I doign requests now? Well we will see...
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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Requests? You mean you don't instantly bow to the whims of your readers? Didn't someone giving a poorly-worded review say that you don't do that as often as you should?

Enough of that loincloths and arrows bullshit, they need to step up and put those bastard wolves, cats, pigs, and squirrels in their place. The first order of business is pants and shirts, no one has won a modern war half naked and covered in paint.

I'm talking about rewriting the Ano-Chee as the Bunker State.
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Canuovea
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Well, to be fair, they aren't fighting a modern war...
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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By steel and fire, through cold planning, and without a shred of regret, they would crush all opposition beneath their bootheels and the tracks of their infernal machines of war.

Even the mighty empires of the Ivos and Nymus would quickly fall when faced with the unstoppable forces arrayed against them, their gods seemingly abandoning them to their fate (as punishment, or do the gods themselves cower in fear?).

Even the King in the West may feel a sting of uncertainty, maybe even fear somewhere in the heart of his blackened soul, when word comes of a Great Army that lays waste to those who oppose it (by the thousand) with poison, disease, and the power of the atom itself, that this new enemy would chose to rend the very fabric of matter and salt the earth with death. He jolt from his sleep with their cries of victory still ringing in his ears; was it just his mind still waking from sleep, or did he really hear their voices echoing from the walls of his chambers, a premonition of things to come?

The Uberfuchs is superior, he builds even greater strength, not flinching in the face of unyielding progress, never once looking back with regret as he marches forward with logic in his mind and strength in his arms.

He may not face a modern opponent as he strides the globe from one victory to the next, but he knows full well that his is the harbinger of reason, liberating his fellow man from the clutches of ignorance and superstition.


Okay... maybe not. Even without throwing "Uberfuchs" in there it still sounded like the manifesto of a fascist ultranationalist, "peace comes through subjugation and obedience" and all that crap. You couldn't really make a comic with them as the good guys, or even friends of the heroes; they might be enemies of the West, but they'd most likely poke the heroes in the neck with a bayonet on principle.

Blame yourself though, I had to come up with a "Bunker State" answer for why making the Ano-Chee an unrelenting wall of modern militarization would be reasonable, and it pretty much requires turning them into something that borders on evil.

My point being that loincloths and what amount to hide bras don't go well with firearms, this is something you would know if you've ever had a hot shell (or several if dealing with an automatic) go down your shirt and (thanks to a sequence of events caused by having your shirt tucked in) wind up sharing space with your knob. Hot brass is hot. I'm just looking out for the foxes so that they don't end up getting their new rifles and having a whole bunch of round and oblong burns in uncomfortable places, or if we're still dealing with black powder, patches of fur missing where they set themselves on fire.

If they don't wear more clothes they'll look mangy when they burn their fur off, I like foxes, so I can't abide by that.
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Canuovea
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Well, I guess that the Golta managed by just wearing more clothes.
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Harkovast
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I dunno if you guys noticed, but Red Sword's outfit is a combination of Native American and Japanese costume.
Also he has one eye and one ear (his bandana covers the missing ones.)
He is the last master of the Crazy Bo-Tan style, and so fights without armour.
The fact that he has not been killed despite this should illustrate that Red Sword is not to be fucked with.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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I could take him, I just need my CZ shotgun and a few shells. If I don't get him in the first 2 shots I'd probably be in trouble, but if I lie in wait and ambush him from the right I would only need one (unless he has friends).
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Harkovast
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Well yes, if you are allowed to to jump him with a shotgun when hes not looking...I guess you could take him.
Also a car bomb, missile strike or sniper several miles away would work.

But be warned, if he saw it coming, you would probably be fucked.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Which is why I'd prefer to get the drop on someone like him, they can't cut me in half if I hide in the mud and shoot them when they walk past. I don't even need to worry about precise aim (like with a rifle from several miles), I just need to wait in a spot that he's likely to walk through, then shoot him in the chest and drop him like a blonde in a jumpsuit.
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Harkovast
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Be warned though, Red Sword is very very fast.
If you were distracted for even a brief moment (for example, wondering if you clicked the TWC link on Harkovast today) then you would get shanked.

Also...why the hell are we discussing if you could beat Red Sword in a fight? This makes no God damn sense.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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Yes it does. I like it when people with swords get their asses handed to them by people with firearms, it's just a form of natural selection.

That and I'm willing to be that Ano-Chee (and Ano-Chee that live on a Tsung-Dao diet) must be quite healthy, so Red Sword would probably be good grilled with onions and served with jacket potatoes.

I normally don't like the thought of hunting foxes, but Ano-Chee aren't exactly foxes, and Red Sword looks like he lost a fight with a bear, so I wouldn't feel so bad.

He's one of the good guys, isn't he?

Damn, now I'm hungry.
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Canuovea
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Hmm. Not sure what to say. Aside from: "Nah, I don't eat sentients."
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StyxD
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So, that's a bandana? Really, I though he had badger stripes, or something... I couldn't fully comprehend his head.

So, apparently it's a half-caste that fully embraces his half-caste status and both his races. Fun. Although those frills are garish.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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Frills and tassels are always garish.
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Harkovast
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A bandana and tassles...Red Sword makes bold fashion choices!
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Renard
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There's a difference between "bold fashion statement" and "a fuckton of gaudy tassels and similar nonsense". The bandana is fine, the alternatives would probably be to cover that side of his head with pitch, wear a mask with holes for one eye and ear, or go around making people uncomfortable with his disfiguring wounds.

But the tassels... I just don't like tassels on anything.
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Harkovast
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Ano-Chee are all about tassels!
They aren't brightly coloured or anything, just tan leather.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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What the hell is keeping his face rag on? The thing that would keep it on the top of his head is the general roundness of his head, and the fact that it would conform to that shape and have a pretty snug fit, like most hats.

But trying to put it on the side of the head? It would fall off by itself pretty easily, even if he didn't try to speak, or have facial expressions, or move quickly, or (most importantly) fight, unless he had a string to go around his head, like with an eye patch.
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Harkovast
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Its tied on pretty tight.
He gets them specially made for his head.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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I'm not buying that excuse, but I'll let it slide this time.
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Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
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I can change the way he is draw so his bandana has an ear hole on the other side to help it stay on better.
Thanks for the feed back, have 20 harko points.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Thanks.

Did you add the voting incentive archive to this site?
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Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
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No, I should do that.
Have 20 points for another good suggestion.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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The others can take their occasional massive rewards of many points, I'm happy to collect a more frequent, if smaller, supply points.
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Renard
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This is probably the first time (in reality or fiction) that I've seen the words mercenary, arms dealer, and hero used to describe the same person. Arms dealers and mercenaries are usually low-level thugs at best, and at worst are people like Basil Zaraoff and Viktor Bout.

I'm not sure what to make of the little drawing at the bottom right. I didn't think Golta could smile, I thought the closest they could muster would be a grimace, or maybe a sneer. That's just odd, like seeing a photo of Hitler with his dog, or Stalin at a picnic; these are people who aren't suppose to do things that we can relate to, let alone enjoy them.
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Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
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Good guys need weapons so an arms dealer is not inherently evil.
Everyone needs to make a living, expecting to get paid for fighting is not evil so a mercenary can be a goodie too.

A smiling Golta? Surely a sign of the apocalypse?
Also, Renard have 20 points for clicking my twc button.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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I suppose, but the heroes don't usually get their weapons from a guy who sells weapons to whoever can pay him, whether he's dealing with a military that means well but doesn't have the firepower to secure it's national borders, or dealing with both sides of a war.

There are arms dealers who aren't shady, but it's far more lucrative to sell whatever you can get to whoever can foot the bill, and to assume that people get involved in the arms distribution business for any reason other than making money is pretty naive. Having said that, not everyone involved in the arms business is without scruples, and I'm sure Zilfay is one of those people.

It isn't wrong to ask for payment in return for fighting in a conflict or war, most armies in the world pay their troops. The problem arises when you start talking about businesses or individuals that get paid to fight in conflicts or wars while having no real connection to the fight beyond their contract.

I read somewhere that most times a PMC is hired for actual combat, it's usually to support a military force that isn't effectively trained or equipped to fight by itself, and that any company that gets involved is going to have to use force, which means that they're more likely to slip up and do something bad. So the larger companies usually stay away from that sort of contract, preferring support and training contracts, ones where they're expected to provide security in case of trouble rather than being committed to front-line combat, or when they're working directly for a reputable democratic nation (it looks good for them, and their client isn't as likely to drag them into a mess). But larger companies still do some pretty underhanded work in secret.

The point being that it's hard to trust anyone who offers their services as a soldier in return for payment.

Again, I'm sure Zilfay is an exception to the apparent rule.
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Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
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Normally people who go around killing other people are bad, but in some context that is acceptable or even praise worthy (such as the cast of Harkovast killing bad guys.)
Killing people seems more morally questionable than selling people weapons (or at least as bad.)

Zilfay has standards, and wouldn't throw her lot in with someone she thought was evil. Having said that, she does provide her services in conflicts in which she has no particular vested interest (such as the low level wars between Eslum nations), where neither side is particularly the good or bad one. In her view, the people there feel they need to fight each other and are willing to pay her very well to help out with that goal.
But being a personal of good character she wouldn't stick with a side she felt was behaving badly, such as killing prisoners or pillaging or fighting for a cause she saw as immoral. With Golta Mercenaries in such demand she is able to pick which wars she wants to get involved in.
Basically, when there is a war going on, Zilfay is a good person to know.
Aside from her bad ass skills in battle, she can get you Golta troops, supplies and logistic expertise.
In the Nameless War she helped to liberate Golta cities from the oppression of The Machine and his cult of disciples.

And when she talks she sounds Welsh.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Canuovea
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Pictured: Hungover Weasel
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She runs around and shoots people. Now, let me see if I can remember if Ganbaro is Gay or not... its a two out of three chance...

Sounds Welsh? You mean in an accent that goes up and down like the hills?

The Machine. Did Muir fight that one as well? Sounds like he did.
Resident philosophy and history nut. And amateur swordsman.

"Purple swords? Darsai are weird." -Elyssa

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Renard
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Arms dealers and mercenaries in our world are often pretty questionable, and even those who have a respectable reputation often have some serious skeletons in their closets, but Harkovast is obviously not our world.

Are we left to imagine a Welsh accent, or are you going to write her dialogue in a way that would sound the way a Welsh person would speak it? If so, can you give an example of how you would write dialogue for our smiling Welsh badger?


I was going to say something about "knowing" sheep in the Biblical sense, but I figured that would be in poor taste.
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Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
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Use of the term "boyo" and ending sentences that are statements as questions.

"We need to fight the Nameless, isn't it?"
"Is that right, boyo?"
And so on.

If you dont know what Welsh people sound like you can probably find videos by welsh people on youtube to give you an idea.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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Kiwifox
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Okay, I was just curious how you would put a Welsh accent into text.

Is there any particular reason why Zilfay has a Welsh accent? Or did you just sit down to think about her character and say "This Golta's gonna be Welsh Goddamnit!"
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Harkovast
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I think pretty much the second one.
Zilfay just sounds Welsh, that's all there is too it.
She is the most Welsh sounding badger you will ever meet.
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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That's fine, I'm sure Irish would have worked as well, but I wouldn't have cared if she talked like a Bulgarian Gypsy with a lisp, we're still dealing with a badger with guns, and I like both badgers and guns.

From what we know of Zilfay so far I would say that the only way you could make me like this character any more is if she frequently wears a double-breated greatcoat (having two rows of buttons, in case any of you were unsure), can hold her own in a fist fight even after too much whiskey, and happens to meet Shogun during her adventures and beats seven shades of shit out of him with her bare hands.
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Harkovast
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The cause of all this silliness (sorry about that!)
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Irish and Welsh are not interchangeable!
Irish would not work, boyo!
Zilfay only sounds Welsh!


Anyway, will Zilfay have a run in with Shogun?
We shall have to wait and see...
"The details escape me right now." -Sir Muir on life.
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Renard
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If that does happen I can see him being a knob because he was shot by the Gunsmith.
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