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| KAIJU FAMILY VALUES #2; MAY 2ND, 2018 | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: May 3 2018, 04:23 AM (232 Views) | |
| Deleted User | May 3 2018, 04:23 AM Post #1 |
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![]() KAIJU FAMILY VALUES #2 “RICKY STANTON’S DAY OFF” MAY 2ND, 2018 Filmed live, this time from Ricky Stanton’s front yard, Kaiju Family Values #2 has arrived! Tonight we welcome two new fighters to the Kaiju Worldwide Tour, Anna Mathews and Connor MacNamara. Both appeared on “The Stuff” and signed Stanton Worldwide contracts not too long after. Of course, our Kaiju Heavyweight Champion Kalinda Kriegsdottir will be defending her championship. Kaiju Tag Team Champions MECHA-Kalinda and her mother Sammy 3.0 are also in action. Ricky is in high spirits as he sits on his front lawn watching, planted firmly in a lawn chair. A basic wrestling ring has been set up close to where Ricky is sitting. MECHA-Kalinda and Sammy 3.0(C) vs The Twin Ogres KAIJU TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS 0:00 - The mother daughter duo of Sammy 3.0 and MECHA- Kalinda arrive to “Killer Queen” by Queen. They actually arrive in a limo monster truck, as few other vehicles can fit their massive frames. Ricky Stanton stands up and sings with the chorus of “Killer Queen”. 3:00 The Twin Ogres arrive. They're billed as ogres but they look more like giant trash monsters. This is reinforced by the fact they arrive in a trash truck. 4:00 - MECHA-Kalinda and Sammy 3.0 waste no time squaring off with the Ogres. There are no tags in kaiju rules matches. This leads to utter chaos. Ricky, and the fifty or so friends and family he invited, watch wowed by the action. Highlights include Sammy taking a club to the face, MECHA-Kalinda getting revenge by biting the shoulder off of the Ogre who did it, and Sammy nearly crushing the skull of Ogre 2. 8:35 - Sammy has a brief exchange with one of the Ogres. The Ogre, Ogre 2, tries to use his overpowering stench to poison Sammy. Sammy plays dead until the Ogre closes in. Ogre 2 is caught by kick to the face followed by an Android Dance (Curb Stomp) that crushes the Ogre’s skull and takes him out of the fight. 13:00 - All it takes is an Android Perfection (Top Rope Assisted Brain Buster) to end the match at fourteen minutes. The android duo celebrates while Ricky sings along with their theme. WINNERS: MECHA-KALINDA and SAMMY 3.0 Connor MacNamara (c) vs STANTONBOT STANTON TAPED FISTS CHAMPIONSHIP 0:00 - STANTONBOT arrives first. Ricky stands to his feet in awe of the robot kaiju. He doesn’t seem as pleased when STANTONBOT begins a five minute powerpoint presentation on the side of his house. By the end of it, Ricky is BEGGING someone to shut STANTONBOT up. 5:00 Ricky gets his wish when Connor MacNamara comes rushing from the crowd at ringside, Taped Fist Championship around his waist. His fists are taped, so you know what that means. 6:00 After circling one another for a minute, STANTONBOT begins to swing it’s massive arms. Their size and bulk makes their swings slower than average. As a result Connor is able to dodge all five attempts. Connor doesn’t even fight back. After dodging he leans back against the rope and claps for a fan in the audience wearing a homemade “Gobshite” t-shirt. 8:00 STANTONBOT has his final hours. After dodging yet another combo, Connor goes on the offensive. Blow after blow after blow is landed upon the robot, knocking piece after piece loose. Before long STANTONBOT is on the ropes. He tries to pull a fast one on Connor by attempting to replay his power point presentation. 10:30 - Connor isn’t having any of it. One massive uppercut later, STANTONBOT is down for the count and Connor has retained his championship. Ricky Stanton seems impressed with both, more so with Connor. WINNER: CONNOR MACNAMARA INTERMISSION: At this point the show breaks for twenty minutes. During this time Sammy presents the M3.0 and other Stanton products to the fans in attendance. Kalinda Kriegsdottir (c) vs Lord Barbarian KAIJU HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP 0:00 Kalinda arrives with Sammy 3.0 and MECHA-Kalinda, her family. The three are so cute together it’s sickening. Ricky Stanton again stands for the three, and not only because they make him so much money. 3:00 Lord Barbarian looks like a member of the band GWAR. He arrives by way of horseback while the Conan the Barbarian theme plays. He doesn’t get all the way into the ring before Sammy and MECHA-Kalinda descend upon him, stealing his barbarian sword and shield. 4:00 Lord Barbarian enters the ring after having been mugged by Kalinda’s family. He calls for a time out. Kalinda isn’t having it. There’s an exchange that’s mostly Kalinda beating the barbarian senseless while he tries to escape. It’s of little use. 6:00 Barbarian fights back. He manages to take Kalinda down to the mat after a DDT from out of nowhere. He tries coming down from the top rope with a leg drop. He actually hits, but Kalinda rises from the grave while grasping onto the barbarian. 7:00 The match ends soon after. Barbarian is lifted and brought down upon Kalinda’s knee. The force of this sends shockwaves around the… yard? Since all Kaiju battles are to knock out only, Kalinda is declared winner and celebrates with her family. WINNER: KALINDA KRIEGSDOTTIR Anna Mathews (c) vs A Giant Crab STANTON HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP 0:00 Anna Mathews arrives with the Stanton Heavyweight championship around her waist. Ricky points and says “That’s my champion!” Anna bows to Ricky. She backflips into the ring, displaying otherworldly agility. With a smile she climbs to the top rope and does another backflip, as if to impress Ricky’s friends and family. 2:00 Anna Mathews requested a giant crab to fight, and so she has been given a giant crab. From parts unknown, the Giant Crab arrives by way of a Stanton Enterprises black van. You know the kind, the ones the FBI uses. Anyway, it’s not really all that impressive. 3:00 Anna and the Crab play rock, paper, scissors. Anna loses and stomps on the crab’s foot. The crab rubs his foot. He is not amused. He tries to pinch Anna’s neck. Anna responds with a second stomp. This all leads to a brawling exchange. The two end up in the audience next to Ricky Stanton. 8:00 Ricky’s family watches as Anna bodyslams The Crab on the catering table set up on the lawn. Punch and pieces of cheese goes everywhere. The Crab is up but Anna is quick to dump Tartar sauce on his head. 12:00 The Crab manages to overpower Anna. He grabs the Time Lord by the neck and tosses her back in the ring. The crowd boos. The Crab stops fighting Anna to taunt the crowd, going as far as to promise to pinch off her head. 15:00 The Crab turns around and Anna goes for it. You might only see this here, folks. A patented TIME LORD TELEPORT KICK! Anna’s foot goes THROUGH the Giant Crab. The Crab is down and out, Anna is our winner and retains her championship! WINNER: ANNA MATHEWS POST MATCH Post match Connor MacNamara arrives to put an end to Anna’s celebration. He tells Ricky he’s going to take Anna’s championship. Anna tells him to try. They don’t seem as though they’re going to start fighting. Not just yet. Ricky takes a moment to consider and announces Connor as the number one contender to Anna’s Stanton Heavyweight Championship. We end on Connor, smirking into the camera while holding the Stanton Taped Fists Championship high. |
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6:51 PM Jul 11
